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Tavern Watch Plays Pigeon's 11, Episode 3: All the pretzels you can eat (just gotta steal em first)
May 18, 2025
It's a once-in-a-lifetime heist: to sneak into the biggest game convention around (celebrating much loved baking sim and MOBA Heroes of the Dough) and steal the esports trophy (which happens to be made of pretzels) from under everyone's noses (both literally and metaphorically). But that's not enough for our fine flock of feathered felons, who want to make off with the recipe for the limited edition pretzels that conventioneers are gobbling down, turning one heist into two heists. (Trust me, it all makes sense in context. Well, it all mostly makes sense in context.)
Join GM Liz Harper and a cast made up of Blizzard Watch's bird alter egos for our last game of Pigeon's 11! Here are our players:
- Phil Ulrich as Frankie Two-Talons, a boat-tailed grackle.
- Joan Albright as Professor Beakley, an African gray parrot.
- Eric O'Day as Thurston Owl III, a barn owl.
- Matt Rossi as Drom, an emu.
- Joe Perez as Bennie the Blast, a white-throated sparrow.
- Anne Stickney as Cecilia Cabana Banana Von ChiChi (Cece for short), a pigeon disguised as a peacock.
This adventure is just as wacky as it sounds. So join our crew of birds quest for pretzels, cause chaos, and see how many twists they can pull out of the biggest pretzel heist of their lives. Be sure to go back and listen to Episode 1 and Episode 2 if you haven't!
This is the final game in a three-part series of Pigeon's 11 by 9th Level Games. It uses the Polymorph system for a game that's straightforward, narrative focused, and rewards you for rolling a one (to Matt's unending surprise). This is the second Polymorph game we've played — check out our game of Sentai & Sensibility if you want to see more of the system in action — and we've really enjoyed it!
Intro music for this episode is "Professor Umlaut" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com). Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 License.
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Show More Show Less View Video Transcript
0:00
[Music]
0:10
hey hey hey hey hey Settle down Listen listen I ain't normally one to squawk
0:15
but sure sure I'll tell you about it Tell you about the the whole thing Yeah
0:22
I mean who wouldn't make the same choice right offered the opportunity of a
0:27
lifetime the score of a lifetime wouldn't you do it too I mean yeah I
0:34
would I I would But let me go ahead and tell you about our fine flock of Felonius fowl from Tavern Watch Yeah
0:41
Yeah They're a real pigeons [Music]
0:49
11 So we were wanting to talk about stealing the recipe in addition to
0:56
getting the trophy I think you had a plan CeCe Yeah I'm going to talk to Drum
1:03
because somebody mentioned something and I thought that was an excellent idea Um
1:08
hey Drum Yep You know how you got all those disguises and good stuff and
1:13
costumes and your feathers there Mhm I do know that Can you and I know this is
1:19
a big ask can you make me look like Chris Metel Hold on I pick up my phone I
1:26
pick up my phone and I I immediately look at a picture that I have saved of Chris Metel Okay Yeah I am going to I'm
1:33
going to say one thing Here I I'm going to count this as a call to Lou Like you
1:41
would have had to have I thought about this in advance and prepared it you know So I'm going to call this count this as
1:48
a call to the nest which gives you one heat and you have to make a roll I'll
1:53
assume that I'm the one doing that because I'm the one who needs materials Okay So I need to roll above a one Above
2:00
a one If you roll equal a one something will happen Okay You've been rolling
2:06
ones all day so don't do that now Good thing It's a one It's No a one Okay
2:15
rolling equal So making the call uh gives you one heat Rolling equal to your
2:22
heat you will clear your heat So instead of still having one heat you have no
2:29
heat Uh no heat And you also get to pull off a move called a big con Hang on I
2:37
have to look up uh I have to double check exactly how that works This game
2:42
system has me constantly depressed by good things I thought you failed the role
2:49
Okay there there are actually this is a game that is very narrative focused and
2:54
there are lots of ways to do good things and interesting things So when you roll
3:00
your exact amount of heat you clear your heat and then you get to describe how your action was an awesome success by
3:08
pulling a big con When pulling a big con you decide how you made your action a
3:14
success and come up with a name for your big con Like you know this is this is
3:20
the cartwheel This is the the double you know this is it fancy con that you have
3:28
to do this This is called the I wasn't stalking him I swear I just needed a lot of pictures of him for unrelated reasons
3:35
That's That's killing it You're killing it here Uh basically between me and you
3:41
cut back to when Lou first called me about the gig and I was like "Well I just got out of the nest with like all
3:47
the kids Um I'm going to do the cosplay contest." And he goes "I don't care if
3:52
you do cosplay." Uh and I was like "Okay but I also I need this I got these this
3:59
uh face box that you can put the thing up to a face and it can read the face
4:06
and then print out a really good latex 3D mask but I don't have a any kind of
4:11
like printer for that And he goes "Oh I know this guy named Joe from Buffalo He can do that for us." And so he the guy
4:19
in Buffalo uh 3D prints the mask and sends it expedited shipping uh to us And
4:26
he handed me the mask And now I hand the mask to her going Yeah Yeah This is an exact copy of his face Here are the
4:32
gloves Um I couldn't get his fingerprints Uh that's okay Do you have any um do you have any sunglasses Cuz I
4:40
noticed he's always wearing sungl I'm assuming it's cuz the lights there's like a lot of glare I pull out a wig
4:46
that it matches his hair in the picture Exactly And the wig actually has sunglasses that clip into it Yeah I I
4:54
figured you'd need the sunglasses And fantastic Here's his uh here's his
5:00
muffin shirt Like sometimes he wears a muffin shirt and sometimes he wears a cake shirt And you know he's like you
5:06
know you know for the muffins or glory to the cake Uh I figured he'd probably
5:11
go muffins this year based on previous years I've analyzed in my my Excel spreadsheet on him Okay That's not
5:18
creepy at all You like him don't you Not personally I
5:23
don't know him but I mean he made a lot of games I like I mean you mentioned uh you know uh Bread Thornne which is
5:31
that's a deep cut and the the Frosted Vikings that was one of my favorites Uh I also I also liked uh Rock and Roll
5:39
Kitchen which was just you know lots of cooking I really The bakery level was the best Mhm Yeah Uh so yeah I he's he
5:48
has made a positive influence on my life because I spend a lot of time sitting in a nest unable to do anything with a bunch of you know ungrateful not willing
5:56
to hatch baby emus screaming at me from inside their eggs So yeah it's it's it's
6:01
been a life it's been a lifesaver having having the games Yeah CeCe just kind of looks at you How how many kids do you
6:08
have None Uh emus don't it don't matter if you're related You just they they
6:14
needed a man to sit in the nested with them because men were were fatter and
6:19
you don't eat for like four months Well you're warm Yeah But you don't eat for
6:25
four months and you can't really leave the nest for like four months Uh so you kind of have to do your business in
6:30
there It's it's just a really unpleasant thing and and no female emu is going to lay eggs and then do that too They're
6:36
like "Nope you guys have to do this part." And you know we we're generally like "Okay." Well equal distribution of
6:42
labor is not something I object to No No But it's the way It doesn't It does
6:48
still sound like a raw deal All right I'm going to put the mask on and I'm going to put the wig on and and snap the
6:55
sunglasses in place and put on the little muffin and slide on the gloves and I'm going to go "What do you think
7:00
Do I look like him?" Yeah It's actually terrifying how much you look like him Except of course that she's a pigeon But
7:06
you know other than that yeah it's straight up Cool Cool Also I got to ask you a question Yes You're you're a girl
7:13
right Yes I am You know you're dressed up as a dude peck thing cuz cuz peacocks
7:21
We don't ask questions about that Okay I just wanted to make sure you were doing it on purpose Pay attention if you're
7:27
pretty Have you seen what a female looks like Yeah I know one Uh Sarah she's one
7:33
of my people who supplies me with latex Wow Oh she never asked me any questions about it which is great because it is
7:39
super embarrassing Oh I'm making a mask of a guy I know I don't even know but just you know it's one of those things
7:45
I'm going to go listen to music and calm down now Okay Hey uh Frankie I go
7:51
walking over to him with the full get up on Uh whoa Hey Whoa Uh M Mr Metzel it's
7:57
a uh it's an honor sir It's great to meet you I've heard so much about you Oh wow Really How do you uh I can't wait
8:04
for you to pull off this bitching heist Wait a minute I'm going to kind of
8:09
squint and I'm going to go Is that DC Is that you DC Holy cow What a good costume
8:15
All right What are we doing Well you know how I want to go get that recipe You've mentioned it a time or two So I
8:22
figured maybe if I if you know I look the pot I can just ask for it But I'm
8:28
wondering um cuz uh uh oh my gosh what's her name Um she's really she's got
8:35
really good eyes right She's got really good eyes That is Lucy Lucille The head
8:41
Lucy Lucille She's got like really good eyes and gots like a sense for this thing So I'm thinking maybe you could
8:47
offer some kind of a beefy distraction while I ask one of the other low-level
8:53
bakers if I can get my hands because I can't ask her If I ask her she's going to see right through this thing I'm I'm
8:59
scared she's going to see right through I mean I know I sound just like him but like she's she's real clever that one I
9:08
got just the right idea All we need is to have her in too many places at once and she won't have time to overthink
9:13
about how you're the uh about how her own boss is asking for his own recipe back I got I got I got the perfect idea
9:20
Oh I've got an idea too You do In my journal on my phone but I don't show anyone this but I start writing fanfic
9:26
about how Frankie seduces this chef with his gruff masculine charms It's like yes and her eyes locked
9:35
with his and they both realized that they were in a brooding mood That's kind of dirty Well whatever Who can't be in a
9:41
brooding mood around uh Christopher Metel Okay Professor you want to come with us too Yeah Perfect Multiple hands
9:48
will make this easy So I'll tell you what we do So she's she got like the six cents for anything going wrong in the
9:54
kitchen Right I do want to I I want to pause this and see if Thirsten do you
10:00
want to be involved in this or is there anything else you would like to be doing before we get involved in another thing
10:06
Uh I think I do want to take a swing by and see if I can see if there is a security center that's got anything that
10:11
we haven't covered Um let's do that and then we'll come back to our recipe heist
10:17
So make me a brains roll It's going to be a three Uh and that is a success So
10:24
you were upstairs the other day You did a little cursory looking around and you
10:31
do you walk in there casually like you were meant to be there looking left
10:37
right left right and there is a block of offices and you see a lot of security
10:44
people coming and going from these offices Uh so h you can deduce from kind
10:52
of the the security they aren't really guarding this so much as there's a crowd
10:58
of them coming and going And you think that's probably their headquarters down in this little office block at the end
11:05
of the corridor up on it's up on a mezzanine over the main floor So let's
11:10
see I would ask you to do a feathers roll to sneak in here Or perhaps you
11:17
could do a nest and call for a security outfit They are all wearing black suits
11:25
and a variety of colored ties Let's see I'm not going to be very good at
11:31
feathers check with my Yeah it's not I I will say if anyone if you want to ask
11:37
anyone else's help you could also do that someone could provide either give you advantage on a role or play some
11:44
part in this if anyone would like to join Well in that case what I think I'll do is call the nest for the flock of
11:50
seagulls That is an excellent choice
11:56
So you call the nest Uh first I'm going to make you This gives you See this
12:04
gives you a second heat So you are up to two heat And I'm gonna make you do the heat No Uh thirst So the heat is
12:13
individual It's not party based Cool So Thirstston has one and now you have two
12:20
So you need to roll over a two or equal to a two I think you have pretty good odds All right that's a three A three is
12:26
a success So you do gain a heat but no negative consequences from it and Yukon
12:33
Louu who is able to provide you with a security uniform It is a completely
12:39
black suit with white shirt and a pink tie So you you disguise yourself and of
12:45
course sunglasses They all they're all wearing sunglasses even inside all the time And using this disguise you manage
12:53
to uh hang on You wanted to do the flock of seagulls right Yeah that's right I get something else in my mind Okay let's
13:00
see Flock of seagulls is going to be I'm double checking what it actually says
13:06
about the flock of seagulls So engaging engaging a crew of seagulls that could
13:12
cover your tracks cause a distraction or ruffle some feathers Okay What do you want the seagulls to do Uh I'm going to
13:18
have some seagulls fly in and uh one of the security guards has just put down a
13:24
hot pizza that they've got So the security guards aren't much for the the baked goods pretzel scene Um and so
13:31
we'll say that the seagulls uh just got in and are going to town on that pizza
13:36
Okay Yes The seagulls uh come in they break a window Uh one of these big you
13:44
know it's floor to ceiling glass walls up here The seagulls break a window and
13:50
make a beline for that pizza And the security room is in an uproar every no
13:59
one How do you deal with a seagull who has suddenly come in from outside and is
14:05
attacking your pizza There are seagulls in the room flying in circles with pieces of pizza in their beak just like
14:13
outside of the reach of the security team and there are people like jumping up trying to grab the pizza There are
14:19
people trying to defend the pizza on the table and no one there's at least one
14:25
person going I ran Iran so far away Uh yeah you think you're going reference Uh
14:32
well then you know if you're if you're playing World of Breadcraft you know you
14:38
know that seagulls are bad news Oh bad news
14:44
I So thirsten you you can stroll right in and do whatever you want There are
14:51
banks of computers here with tons of monitors showing the convention center
14:57
from all different angles And there's a bunch of like servers off to the side
15:02
plugged all into each other Lots of cables and networking cables power cables all of that stuff I think what
15:08
I'd most like to try to do is see if I can find some kind of security shift schedule and adjust to make sure that uh
15:15
a couple extra guards get cut and there's extra long shift changes right around when we're trying this heist Okay
15:22
So you go in you go into the computer you know type type You pull up a
15:27
security schedule and you see which guards which guards are on duty and you
15:33
you switch it out So there's a guard change while you're planning to do all of this and you hit print on it and then
15:41
you run off with a stack of papers You tape this up to the wall on top of the other security schedules and uh you yell
15:48
shift change shift changes new schedule new schedule and make your way out of
15:54
there in the chaos while half of the room is dealing with the seagulls who have made off with most of the pizza by
15:59
now And half of the room is like they changed shifts Why did they change the shift schedule I'm looking at the new
16:05
schedule you posted All right I'm going to grab a donut off someone's desk on the way out Absolutely You have acquired
16:11
one donut Is it jelly in the middle You know it
16:17
Uh so yes let's get back to your uh your your heist down here in the bakery All
16:23
right so Frankie is in the midst of explaining his plan which is all right So what we do is we just make so many
16:28
things go wrong in the kitchen at once that no that this that the the the this this psychic chef can't uh can't keep up
16:37
with it all And so when our uh perfectly disguised Chris Wetzel here asks for his own recipe no one will think twice Yeah
16:44
So like switch out the sugar shakers to the salt and things like that You mean Exactly Set some ovens to the wrong
16:50
temperature set some timers uh incorrectly so they're beeping before after they should
16:58
around for the pretzel barons Get that gluten-free bread going to the wrong
17:03
wrong gamer Exactly Spirit already Okay you guys get the
17:10
chaos going and then I'll slip in And by slip in I'll mean stride right up like I
17:16
own the place because I do Walk confidently in and ask for your thing because this is your big day Yeah All
17:21
right Come on Professor We're going to raise a little We're going to We're going to raise a little hack So I will give you several options or
17:28
you tell me what you want to roll based on how you do this You could use a brains roll if you want to like okay I'm
17:34
going to think about this and I know exactly the wrong temperature to turn the ovens or I know exactly the wrong
17:40
thing to do You could use wings if you're going to go in with like agility you're going to be just super fast and
17:48
sneak in so no one can see you when you do this Or you can use Talon which is
17:53
you know going in with strength and brawling skills that you're just going to push through the crowd of bakers here
18:01
and do what you need to do Or you could use feathers if you want to be stealthy
18:06
about it You want to you want to blend in look like you're supposed to be there or you want to sneak in I'll tell you
18:12
what I want to do Use feathers Okay Yeah Go ahead I want to roll stealthily because I have an edge that helps me
18:18
with that Um okay The the big box improve the big box home improvement
18:23
store background gives me an edge on sneaking around and always being on the move which is exactly I just want to go
18:29
from place to place just subtly manipulating just being real subtle Okay
18:34
so you give me a feathers roll with advantage Let's see Feathers I want a five six seven eight or nine So here we
18:41
go Uh I didn't get either of those I got two and a four Oh Ooh Yeah Neither of
18:49
those is good So you are going to take a heat and I need you to make a heat roll
18:54
for me You only have one heat so you need to roll Yeah this is There's
19:00
basically no losing this roll but you need to you need to roll anyway Yeah I rolled a seven Okay So you sneak in and
19:10
it's kind of it's just obvious I mean it's it's busy right now There's a lot
19:15
of people here but it's obvious you don't belong You don't have the right costume It really looks like you're
19:21
sneaking in to steal pretzels because a lot of people have been trying to get behind the counter They want those
19:28
limited edition Wintermint pretzels So someone at the front counter is like "Hey hey no not just anyone can come in
19:36
here You're going to have to stand in line like everybody else." I don't know why I'm doing that accent It just
19:42
happened cuz we're all doing accents today It's great There's There's a lot of like New York Jersey kind of accents
19:49
that you just sort of do accidentally when we're doing this Hey you flapping
19:54
here Hey so you do not succeed but you do not
20:00
suffer any further consequences from this All right professor Looks like it's
20:05
up to you M All right I'm going to use my magician's assistant background and
20:11
roll feathers Try and slide of hand all of these sandwiches Okay So roll Yeah
20:18
that's a five That is a success on a feathers roll So what exactly are you doing here You're mixing the sandwiches
20:24
up Yep I'm going to send the the wrong bread to the gluten-free player Okay Uh
20:32
so yes you you shuffle all of the sandwich orders making sure to send the
20:39
non the normal non-gluten-free bread on the sandwiches to all of the pretzel
20:46
barons So and you mix up and also their cheese gets swapped up and there's mustard on sandwiches that should have
20:53
had onions and you know the whole the whole table here You mix everything up
20:58
So now they're getting the orders wrong for everyone who's been waiting in line that clogs up everything There's a crowd
21:04
Everyone's demanding their sandwiches being remade It's slowing everything down This crowd of hungry pretzel lovers
21:12
is is waiting and upset And so the kitchen is just a mess right now as
21:17
everyone is on like double double work to remake all of these sandwiches And I
21:22
come strolling on up Come strolling on up Hey Hey What's up everybody
21:30
And you I do want you to make a feathers roll to uh how convincing you are And
21:36
also you can make it with advantage I mean you've put a lot of work into this costume I mean this is amazing Okay Um I
21:44
got a zero That's a 10 Is that on a D10 That's a 10 Yeah Yeah So yes a 10 is
21:52
actually this is perfect A 10 You are rolling your cover which your cover is
21:58
your disguise that you have chosen for this event You you switched your cover into this Christopher Metzel costume So
22:07
absolutely this perfect this is the dice telling the perfect story for us You are
22:13
completely convincing There is some of the people in Sandwich line are coming over to Chris Chris Chris me can I have
22:21
an autograph Can I Yeah So oh whoa whoa whoa Okay everybody calm down Calm down
22:28
What's going on with the line here guys I like lean into the chefs
22:35
Just a mistake with um you know Lucy is up front Just a mistake with the ordering system Chris it's We're working
22:42
on it right now We're We're going to We're going to sort this out Just going to take us a few extra minutes Don't
22:47
worry everybody We're We're going to make all of these sandwiches perfect with Extra extra pretzels on the side
22:54
for everybody in the crowd Oh hey that's right What do you think guys For for the wheat for the muffin
23:02
Yeah there there's just different portions of the crowd break out into cheers You've got everyone hyped up and
23:09
super excited You mind if I duck in the back for a second It's getting a little uh little
23:14
cramped out here Go for it Chris No problem I'm just gonna I'm gonna be up here and she's
23:20
like making sandwiches really fast throwing together bags of pretzels Cool
23:25
All right keep it up Keep up the good work Go into the bag I find a find a
23:30
chef I I need to find a chef who is working who's working on pretzels Like
23:37
specifically the winter mint pretzels but like if I Is there anybody back there who's making them right now Like
23:43
pulling them out of the oven or anything like that Uh I I will say so They've been in very very high demand So there
23:50
is someone sort of in a rush around the back of the bakery trying to get more
23:55
out there for hungry demanding winter mint loving fans Well I'm just going to
24:00
stroll right up to Hey how's it going How How's it going with the new stuff Oh
24:06
Mr Pretzel Oh your your new pretzels are so popular We are We have been so busy
24:12
so busy baking fresh ones up It's weird It's weird I don't I don't know what's
24:18
going The vibes are off with it right Vibes are off And I had a couple people tell me that they didn't they weren't
24:24
they weren't quite as uh uh cool at the end as they usually are Oh no Oh do do I
24:30
have Okay So he's like "Do you mind if I uh check that recipe you got?"
24:36
I want to make sure they printed it right Of course Of course Mr Russell He pulls
24:41
a notebook out of his uh out of his pocket and he's like flipping through it and he's I'm sure I holding it out where
24:48
you can see it I'm I I'm sure I did the proportions right I'm going to you know maybe maybe the spearmint maybe I didn't
24:56
use enough spearmint oil Oh yeah Let let me see Let me see Yeah Yeah He hands it
25:01
right over to you I I take it I'm like h you know I need to make him a couple of correction You got a pen Yeah of course
25:08
Of course And you know he pulls one out of again his pocket Okay I'll be right back I'll be right back I gotta go Uh
25:16
phone real quick Somebody Somebody's texting me real fast I I'll add some more spearmint to these Go ahead Right
25:22
away Right away I'll I'll I'll be right back Watch out with the notebook
25:28
And if anybody asks let me go If anybody tries to stop me I'm going to go Sorry
25:35
guys I I I got a breath event at two I got I got to go get two I'll see you all later
25:41
Don't forget to grab a tray of those uh Don't forget about the winter mid It's real special Yeah Grab grab a gra
25:49
confiscated tray of those poorly made pretzels on your way out Oh hey can I have a can I have a bag of the winter
25:55
mid to go Of course Of course Mr You know everyone in the back I there are a
26:00
few people who are just they're very frazzled Very frazzled baking crew They
26:06
hop right to it to get you a bag of these pretzels Great Thanks guys See you
26:12
later You're all doing You're doing real good work Really proud of y'all Yeah Keep it up Go [ __ ]
26:21
Professor Beley is outside interviewing some of the disappointed sandwich eaters about their experience
26:28
I walk up to the professor and put like an arm around her I go "Hey I'm ready for our interview now." Oh Oh let's go
26:36
We should go We should go over to the uh the media room place Oh thanks for
26:42
thanks for talking to me and answering questions Got to go I I love I love I
26:47
totally love independent news sites It's it's it's like a really cool thing for me I'm really glad that you guys love
26:54
We'll see you guys later I just like roll up for the cake For the muffin
27:03
Whatever Whenever whenever CC says something like that there is just a roar
27:09
from everyone nearby They you know it's just it's just huge The crowd is so
27:15
hyped I'm like can we find like a little room or something to talk into Uh yes
27:23
absolutely You you walk through the hall and your your mental disguise does
27:28
continue does continue getting attention but uh the crowd isn't isn't too bad
27:34
They mostly they mostly treat you with respect except when you're obviously like amping them up Well I'm going to
27:41
like duck us into a room somewhere and immediately immediately pull off the mask and go "Oh my god that was a lot I
27:50
don't know how he does it I thought you did amazing Thank you I
27:56
worked really hard on the accent Look I got the recipe I don't know how to read
28:01
it but I will figure it out and then we're going to be so far into pretzel Looks I got a whole bag of pretzels for
28:07
us Another bag of the mint ones because oh my gosh they're limited edition Limited edition Now I'll make them any
28:14
day I want to as soon as I figure out how to read this recipe Uh so that was an that was an extremely extremely
28:22
successful heist Now on to the big game So yes Does anyone else want to do
28:27
anything here Uh cosplay Cosplay Yeah I'm just waiting for the cosplay
28:34
Benny just asking if you if you have anything to do with Oh no I'm just letting this play out Uh yeah Yeah it's
28:40
a good show It's a good show And there's there's lots of great people watching going on in this chaos So we will fast
28:48
forward to the cosplay competition The show floor has only gotten busier during the afternoon though it has the crowds
28:57
have kind of dispersed They're kind of spread out amongst the convention center Uh during the open ceremony Christopher
29:03
Metel got on stage and announced the new sandwich themed expansion And that's why
29:09
we've been serving sandwiches all day It's in celebration of the sandwich
29:14
expansion coming this fall to Heroes of the Dough So the the crowd is pretty
29:21
hyped and also sandwiches are sandwiches are delicious sandwiches on pretzel buns pretty good So costume contest coming up
29:29
They're starting to get organized by the main stage Backstage all of the cosplayers or are milling around setting
29:37
up ready to go on stage I'm waddling around in my incredibly heavy even though it's not actually metal uh Bake
29:44
King armor And uh I have the special uh limited
29:49
edition set of gingerbread Like it's all gingerbread looking because it's you know it's the special skin that you of
29:56
course it's Yeah So it's the special the special winter themed Baked King king
30:02
skin that they released uh two years ago for the holidays Mhm So it is very
30:08
impressive All the red and and green dots around it and the uh frosting edges
30:13
and uh frosting mourn itself has got a little dab of stuff on the end because that's how you spread it obviously What
30:19
why would he not just use his gigantic sword to do that That that makes perfect sense Um so yeah I'm just waddling
30:25
around cuz you know emo waiting to see how well I do when I get to do the walk and everything So uh where is everyone
30:33
else when the costume competition is starting You were planning on doing your
30:39
heist during this So where is everyone positioned for this Yeah they should be over at the arena cuz like this is just
30:46
a possible distraction They need to be here for that I mean I'm just milling about waiting to pull in stand by the uh
30:52
the breaker Okay That we figured out we needed for the esports arena Yeah And I'm just milling about trying to get
30:59
make sure that I have easy access to uh the fire alarm I'm in a uh high enough spot in kind of the I'm assuming there's
31:06
like spots for people to watch the arena competition Uh yes there's kind of you
31:11
know there's stadium seating in the arena Yeah I want I want one high I want one high enough that I have like a
31:17
decent view of the uh the room Thson's up high enough that he can kind of keep an eye on the guards and make sure
31:22
they're filtering out and they're kind of decreasing in number So uh there are also kind of in the high points of the
31:29
arena there's sort of scaffolding that's not the right word that lights are hanging off of So there's something of
31:35
that nature that you can go and perch on and keep an eye on everything And of course since you scheduled a shift
31:41
change right now there are people leaving people waiting for their uh
31:47
replacement to come on and looking at their watches and like why are they late to the I get the new schedule I should
31:53
probably text them But there's a lot of switching around and maybe some confusion because this was a pretty last
32:00
minute change So yes security is lightning just because of sort of the
32:05
confusion Some people are like the schedule says my shift is over I'm just going to leave I'm just going to leave I
32:11
don't have to be here The schedule you know So security has lightened up in the arena and the crowds in the arena have
32:18
also lightened up because everyone wants the costume contest is pretty exciting
32:24
and even there are still some esports players at their desks There's still some technical folks at their desks you
32:30
know making sure all the cabling is right making sure there aren't any issues for the big competitions tonight
32:37
Yeah Waiting for their sandwiches to come you know the esports team they're
32:43
mostly here for the competition maybe not so interested in cosplay So a lot of
32:50
them are still here waiting on dinner And there are some really dedicated fans
32:55
in the arena holding their spots You know they want to make sure they have good seats for the end of the night Okay
33:02
So who's gonna set this off So we know Frankie my fire alarm impression Well
33:07
you're gonna if you're going to do the lights we I think we would Well I'll I'll shut up Other people can No no I'm
33:13
just Benny I I just want to say we know Professor Beley is by the breaker boxes
33:19
to hit the lights Uh Frankie is up in the he's got a seat in the stadium
33:25
seating watching everything Thirsten is up in the rafter sitting near the lighting uh keeping an eye from the sky
33:33
Uh drum ready to enter the cosplay contest Maybe make a scene Binnie Well I
33:40
guess that's the confusion because I thought we were going to hide the the thing in Drum So aren't we Oh yeah That's We're waiting That's why I
33:46
thought you guys would have to wait until after the at least until Yeah So we have to wait for that to be done
33:52
We're waiting for Drum to walk That's going to be our signal because then Drum's going to hight tail it back to
33:58
where we are at Yep Like I'm I'm not waiting to see if I win That's my long legs Okay Actually yeah emos are pretty
34:04
fast Mhm Okay Very very good point from Biddy in the logic and the chaos What
34:12
are what are you going to be doing Pity I'm waiting to pull the fire alarm Okay Okay And uh Cecilia I assume that you
34:20
are in the arena as well I am loitering near the center of things just talking
34:27
to people about um the matches that have happened so far and who happens to be in
34:34
a lead and if they think anybody and also what they think of so and so's gluten allergy because that seems to be
34:40
the hot topic of the day and basically just uh keeping space near a target Okay
34:48
Okay So all of this is going on and uh let's cut over to the costume contest Uh
34:56
up on the stage the the crowd over here is actually pretty packed It's not quite as packed as it was for the opening
35:03
ceremony but it is pretty close So uh they start introducing cosplayers one at
35:11
a time Everyone is in order Everyone you know parades across the stage Some
35:17
people are you know a little better dressed than others Some people it's
35:22
like it's an A for effort You were clearly very enthusiastic about this And
35:27
there were some people who went all out and have like realistic articulating
35:33
pretzel arms coming up out of their backs Are they broadcasting this like on the screens in the arena They are They
35:40
Yes they are Okay good Cuz I want to see Drum walk And so one one after the other
35:46
people parade across the stage They have their little moment in the spotlight and walk back off and eventually drum kind
35:52
of halfway through the event It is your turn to get up and walk across the stage What are you doing Uh basically I wanted
36:01
to set it up so that I come out through the curtain and my the sword is lit up
36:08
because I' it's actually a plastic crystal with like LEDs in it So the sword lights up and I walk about halfway
36:16
stagger fall to one leg and the braid breaks on the ground because it's set up
36:23
to break when I smack it down And I curse and rip off the helmet and you
36:29
know basically I replicate the bake king's death animation from Heroes of the Dough And I just
36:35
boom no And then when the lights only dark bread before me Yes
36:43
Nice And then uh as the lights dim a little I just scoot off the stage I go
36:49
literally just get off the stage as fast as I can cuz I have to get to the other side of the place And there is elbow the
36:55
person I'm talking to and go "That's my buddy." There is a lot of applause as you do
37:01
this This is a very you know most people are walking across the stage doing a
37:06
turn This was a very dramatic reenactment and the crowd is very impressed So you head off the stage What
37:13
is uh what is everyone else doing to enact their plan Well I'm just waiting for the once the lights go out then I'm
37:19
hitting the uh hitting the fire alarm Okay And I think the cue was supposed to
37:24
be when we see Drum running in that's when we hit the lights Mhm Yeah Yeah
37:30
I'll give him I'll give him a few minutes to get through the crowd before I before I bust that bark
37:38
And I didn't really have an assigned role but if I see any guards who somehow see through our distractions and are
37:43
heading for the trophy I'm going to want to mess them up Mhm Okay So let's go
37:49
What one of the things about Christopher Metzel is he is very paranoid about
37:56
birds since you know a pigeon many years ago Many years ago a pigeon came and
38:04
stole his first batch of Metsel's pretzels It wasn't me I swear
38:11
And I mean this story is the stuff of legend None of you no one knows who pulled out this heist stealing the very
38:19
first batch of these much favored pretzels So Metson is very wary of birds
38:26
and security security
38:31
is has been pretty tight but y'all have done a lot to uh to keep the heat off to
38:37
keep uh to keep him distracted So I think you have very good odds here So I
38:43
just give the word Give the word Let's do this Lights out Okay The lights drop
38:50
There's kind of sort of anxious murmuring in the crowd They don't know what to do when the lights go off Oh my
38:55
god What was that you guys I'm so surprised when the lights go off It is extremely
39:03
extremely dark Like outside in the front of the convention hall it's walls of
39:09
glass but inside the rooms themselves there are no windows There are not
39:14
windows in here It is extremely extremely dark All right then I would like to do my distraction uh chaos
39:22
moment and uh pull the fire alarm And the fire alarm goes off and there is
39:27
immediate the anxiety level in the crowd amps up pretty quickly And you know no
39:35
one pays attention to the emergency evacuation maps and now it's very
39:41
dark So there is there are people kind of going in every direction and they don't know which direction to go A lot
39:47
of them most of them are heading towards where they remember the front exit the front entrance was So there was a rush
39:54
of people in that direction even as some staff pull out flashlights and they're
39:59
like orderly orderly evacuation one at a time emergency you know they're trying
40:05
to direct people but people are pretty concerned pretty concerned CeCe is going to like avoid the flashlights and try
40:13
and get up to where the trophy's at Uh Thirstston's going to glide down and try
40:18
to find Drum and land on his back and sort of make sure that he can get where he's going in the dark Since owls have
40:25
night vision I can kind of whisper the best way to go around the crowd Okay Um I'm using the sword to provide me a
40:32
little light but that's much better So I turn my sword off Just just tell me where to go Uh but hold on And I break
40:39
out into a full sprint Uh which is of 50 kilometers per hour Uh emus can run pretty
40:45
So make me either a wings roll or a talons roll for making that probably
40:54
talons for making this rush through the crowd you know Do you do you manage to A
40:59
six is a success You have a d6 right Uh yep Six is the top of it Yep So a a six
41:07
is your cover where you succeed based on um you know based on your disguise based
41:14
on your excellent disguise You were still dressed up as the bake king Nobody
41:20
messes with the bake king No one messes with the bake king So even as some of
41:27
the security some of the employees trying to evacuate hit you with their you know get you in the light even as
41:32
some emergency lighting comes up and you're more easily seen they they were just like "Whoa whoa it's the bait king
41:39
Get out of the way." So everyone kind of if they see you they dodge around you
41:44
and you make a very good time to the other side of the arena the other side of the convention center Okay Thank you
41:51
Thirstston Again you're much smarter than I am I'll throw in a little bit of a a
41:56
screech to make sure that he's successful getting people out of his way Uh the the owl screech Um something
42:02
along the lines of the background noises from the Icing Citadel Absolutely terrifying Yes people are
42:09
they they do not want to be there Probably sounds like that one from the login screen where you tried to get in
42:14
before Cinnamon Goa yelled at you Oh god it was the worst Your pathetic spices
42:20
have betrayed you Can Can Cece get up to
42:25
where the where the trophy is Like can she pull it down or uh So make
42:31
a a wings roll or a Talons's roll about you know can you can you jump up there
42:38
dodge away from people and uh get to where you want to be
42:44
Are you are you rolling wings or talons Which one is which Uh so wings is like
42:49
agility and talons is more strength So you know how are you doing this
42:54
basically Well she's trying to be kind of stealthy about it Okay that would be if you're trying to be stealthy that I'm
43:01
going to say that's feathers Okay Yeah she's trying not to be noticed is basically Okay And uh some emergency
43:09
lighting has come up here Not enough to really give a good lighting A lot of the security is focused on getting people
43:17
out and there's less security than usual It's it's very chaotic No one knows
43:22
where to go So yes you do manage to get up the trophy It is on the central dis
43:29
There's the trophy and there are just pretzels scattered all around it I pick up a few pretzels and eat them while I'm
43:35
like pulling at the trophy This has happened
43:42
Yeah So uh Frankie Frankie you're in here What are you What are you doing If I can see Cece making a go for the
43:48
trophy uh I'm going to I'm going to join her so that we got two in one spot That way I can fend off any heat she gets But
43:54
also I'm going to get some of those pretzels and throw them into the trophy May as well carry them out with us right
44:00
And while they're doing that with everybody cramming for the exits I'm going to try to cause more chaos by like randomly tripping people Okay Roll
44:08
talents to see how successful you are at that That is a six Uh and a six You are
44:16
That's your cover isn't it That's the maximum roll on your dice That is the max So that is your cover That is an
44:24
automatic success And you were uh using your disguise to help you succeed here
44:30
Well I guess I probably would have already been I already I would already be in like the janitor get up I guess or or what the the uniforms that we got I
44:38
guess would be the best word I'm just making my way through people and just like occasionally just tripping one of
44:43
them up So actually since you are using your disguise to help you you could be
44:48
in here giving them incorrect information about the exits Oh exit back that way That's the nearest exit Yeah
44:54
let's do that And everyone thinks you are everyone Yeah Everyone thinks you're an employee so everyone is listening to
45:00
you following your instructions and yeah now half of the half of this area is
45:05
going the wrong way and people are running into each other Yeah it's it's a
45:11
mess over here at this exit Perfect So I will say that Thirsten and Drum you make
45:18
it over to the entrance of the esports arena just fine And uh there there is a
45:25
lot of chaos at the entrance to the arena There's a this is people coming and going trying to get out Security is
45:31
trying to help people in the right direction but it's it's a little bit of chaos DC we got to go There's drum Do
45:38
you think I could jump over them all Are they in the way or what Uh they are in the way You will have to make your way
45:44
through the crowd And I'll say you could make different You could
45:49
use wings and literally fly over the crowd I can't actually do that I'm I
45:56
mean you pointless I mean they they could come out to you Well I should ask which one are you doing Are you trying
46:02
to muscle your way in or you actually they they have to come out of the arena
46:07
because the truck is parked behind the convention Yeah Home Yeah So they have
46:12
to come out Okay Then I just I basically I try to look as much like a statue of
46:18
the bake king as possible Like just have a statue of the bay king there I just go
46:23
up against the wall and look like a statue and maybe with with an owl perched on you that is making screeching
46:29
sounds Yeah Yeah I don't know why you'd have one but whatever Yeah Yeah But it it's making accurate sound effects
46:36
Thirstston is there Okay So Frankie and I are going to try and get this thing out of here So I'll say you could muscle
46:43
your way through with talons You could fly through the crowd with wings or use agility to duck through people's legs
46:51
You tell me how you want to get out We're probably going to want to muscle our way through here I'm thinking
46:57
Professor Be can uh do a distraction for you if you need it Okay Okay Because
47:03
because of course the African gray parrot is known for its keen intellect as well as its skilled mimicry Ah okay
47:11
So what what would you like to do Professor Geekly will uh will distract
47:17
everyone by shouting in Christopher Metsel's voice free muffins and cake for
47:23
the faction who can shout their their loyalty the loudest
47:29
over by Everyone is kind of confused Everyone is extremely confused They're
47:35
going in different directions because Betty has been misdirecting people They
47:41
are a little spooked by the super realistic bake king that is outside the
47:46
entrance of the arena They are confused The alarm is blaring behind them And now
47:52
there's free food Free food I mean maybe was this all planned Is this all an act
47:58
Is this free food So then we are shouting for the muffins for the
48:04
pretzels for the bread And uh so yes now there is even more chaos and security is
48:11
still trying to get people going in the right direction but it's become almost almost impossible Okay So what do we
48:18
need to roll Can I roll What is it Roll for roll talent Mustling talents Okay
48:24
Yeah And both of you roll Okie do Roll a one Well a one is a gadgets roll So that
48:32
means you have a a piece of technology that you obviously planned on having from the start that immediately makes
48:38
you succeed at this Um so yeah you tell me Flashback to when I gave uh the owl
48:44
the set of cooking utensils No I rolled the Yes I know You now could could have
48:51
those You just decided you wanted them and you took them and he wasn't looking Oh wait No no no I know what I'm going
48:56
to do Okay cool How big is this trophy It's about a a foot tall and
49:03
maybe eight or nine inches wide It's a bit It's good size It's notanky huge
49:09
Frankie you think you can push this thing on your own Uh yeah probably Okay hang on I'm going to climb up inside of
49:16
it right I'm just going to climb up on top of all the pretzels that we put in it And I'm going to take I'm going to
49:22
take the metal mask out of my pocket and I'm going to slip it on real fast Did
49:28
that count as a gadget I had it on me Okay I'll take it I'll take it Uh
49:35
meanwhile I got a I got a six for my talents check which is a success That is a success So yes you were easily able to
49:42
you know grab onto the trophy or push the trophy Hang on Either way you've got
49:48
a good grip on the trophy and you are able to muscle through the crowd push people aside when you need to And I'm
49:53
going to like poke my head out of the top and go "Hey you guys it's all good It's cruel We just need to We need to
50:00
evacuate It It's all out this way Come on Let's go for the muffins For the pretzels There is again a lot of
50:08
shouting in response whenever Metsel calls out for a for a call back Point to
50:14
the entrance that I want everybody to spill out of Right Let everybody while they're
50:21
spilling out spill out with them And then we're going to I'm going to duck back into the trophy Right and and get
50:26
to the side and go "Fggie Frankie get over the drum Get over the drum." Uh yeah Now it's kind of a stampede at this
50:34
point People are following Metsel's voice and they are you know they're
50:40
running for the exits and then there of course the people who are running for the free baked goods in the bakery from
50:46
the last call out and there are people just running in the wrong direction because Benny miss is misdirecting them
50:54
So yes you with all of this chaos you can definitely get to your emu friend
51:02
Yeah I'm just going to wing it I'm going to wing it to the emu as fast as I can with this trophy coming into his wings
51:07
Here Here I'm an emo emu cuz I'm like all skulls and stuff on my gingerbread
51:12
armor Uhhuh Once they get to me I'll literally um I'll have uh Thirsten do a loud shriek
51:20
and pop up and I'll try to grab the the uh trophy with her in it I guess with
51:27
CeCe in it and just stick it under the armor plate Okay And I will ask Thirsten
51:32
specifically what is there anything else you want to do here Yeah I guess guide everybody on the way out Okay Yeah cuz
51:39
it there's some emergency lighting but it is still pretty dark that I was going to say there's a role involved That
51:44
might actually be a job for Frankie Yeah we should probably uh look into that
51:51
So so what are what are you trying to do here from this point Uh so the so
51:57
there's not very much in the way of lighting Correct Not very much There's a little a little but not much Yeah So I
52:05
I'm not really trying to be subtle about it I just want to lead everybody uh try to lead everybody uh navigate us safely
52:11
through this crowd back to our truck And this is where I get to drop my second bird fact Um crackles are one of a
52:18
species of bird that generates a naturally known material called magnetite uh in their brain and their
52:25
beak But what this does is it lets grles navigate using the latent magnetic fields of the earth Mhm Yep Okay Okay
52:33
Yeah No that's that's that's how I want to navigate us out of this place
52:39
Absolutely And I'm going to assume that Thirstston is also flying overhead keeping an eye out helping you get you
52:45
know the best way through these chaotic chaotic stampeding crowds at this point
52:52
cuz he has you may know which way magnetic north is but he has a better
52:57
view of what's happening Now I'm going to say on Overwatch Oh he is He is He's
53:03
on Overwatch keeping an eye on you guys So I am going to ask uh Benny what are
53:09
you up to after getting the crowd riled up and going in every direction Oh no I just need to cheese it and meet up with
53:14
the gang So okay And uh you know what direction they're in H apparently emus
53:20
have magneto reception as well It a lot of birds do which it's I didn't I didn't think of it I'm not going to do anything
53:27
with it I just I'm just surprised Like wow I did not know that
53:33
That is funny fact By listening to this game you have
53:38
subscribed to Bird Facts It's true And uh Professor Beakley what are you doing
53:44
Um yeah I think I'm just hanging back and taking photos
53:49
Yeah that does that does fit with your cover Kind of getting getting a look at pretty dark photos but still you're
53:56
getting some crowds Every time they kind of hit right in the emergency lights you get some crazy dramatic shots of people
54:04
It's for the scrapbook Got to get a get a great one of the bake king Uhhuh Yeah
54:10
Well you know you need to post it on brownie watch obviously Lots of lots of green and red lights and you know the
54:16
big news So yeah you could you can probably track me relatively easily Mhm Uh so you make it to the back door to
54:23
the loading dock and back there there is a box of employee uniforms You've got
54:28
the bowling shirts You got the whole look out there Oh I'm sorry There is also armor So and as I'm taking off the
54:36
armor and putting on that stuff Mhm There there are also people there's a lot of confusion back here as well Some
54:42
people have made their way out this exit and are confused Where am I supposed to go What's going on Is the building on
54:48
fire What's what's happening Is it are there free muffins inside I don't know And there are some you know dock workers
54:55
and uh employees who are trying to get people to go where they should go to evacuation zones or whatever So there is
55:02
again distraction but I would like I would like a feathers roll from
55:11
everyone who is out here You're getting to a new costume You are trying to sneak
55:17
away Huh Everybody but Thirsten is is out here aren't we Everyone except I
55:24
Thirsten did you follow everyone out or not Yeah Yeah we're on the way out with everyone So everyone except Professor
55:31
Beakley is out here I rolled a two Uh a two is indeed a
55:37
failure So I got a five I rolled a one
55:43
Five is a success Okay hang on Let me go down the list Frankie what did you roll
55:48
I rolled an eight which is my cover Uh eight is your cover So you have gotten
55:53
into your outfit and you look great You look extremely convincing Everyone is
56:00
sure you're supposed to be here No problem Thirsten what did you roll Two
56:05
Uh two A two is a failure on feathers So
56:10
we have one success one failure Um let's see Uh thirst drum what did you roll You
56:16
rolled a one One Yep So that is a success Using your I don't know how this
56:23
is going to work That's a gadget roll But using your your gadget that you brought you managed to completely
56:29
succeed Do you want to tell me how you succeed at your role with your gadget of
56:34
a brick Um like how are people people like like looking around and they might
56:39
see us changing Uh yes they might There are a fair number of people and they aren't actively watching for you but
56:47
there are a lot of eyes out here I throw the brick so that it hits the nearest uh
56:52
like parkan type light and pushes it out so it's blinding the people in the crowd
56:58
instead of illuminating us Okay Yeah there's we'll say there is an emergency
57:03
light back here that is that is lit up and yes you you smash it out of the way
57:08
and everyone is suddenly looking in a different direction It is dim over here Uh so let's see Uh Benny you were out
57:17
here with everybody What did you roll I rol a five A5 A5 is a success So you uh
57:23
you get your costume on You're looking great And Cecilia you rolled a failure I think A two A two So that is a failure
57:33
You were not too convincing but we had more Let's see We had two I was going to
57:39
do this based on how many successes and failures we had but it's even I think we
57:45
had three successes didn't we Three One of you isn't here We had Frank and
57:51
Thirst and Benny all succeed No drum Yeah Yeah Okay Three Three successes two
57:58
failures Yes So I'm going to say that between everyone who succeeded is going to you know particularly dram throwing
58:05
that brick that got people's attention away Yeah And hang on Uh Frankie and
58:13
Thirsten got their costumes on and got set up Frankie is uh Frankie has uh is
58:19
doing another uh is doing an impersonation of a different game developer This time a game director and haha costas and uh just using his very
58:27
calming tone to convince everyone that there's no need for alarm Um yeah Yeah
58:32
that is a good one Yeah Oh my gosh I keep forgetting who succeeded and and who failed So Cecilia I know you failed
58:40
You do have to make you do take a heat and you have to make a heat roll I rolled a five A five That is over your
58:47
current heat So that is a success No further consequences Okay Thirsten you
58:53
failed Oh my gosh I'm not keeping track of this very well I've got three heat Yes
58:59
Hopefully above Yeah it's a three Well so a three is uh you get to pull a big
59:07
con You clear all of your heat and you get to pull a big a big con So explain
59:13
to me how you have pulled off a smashing success at disguising yourself and
59:19
getting out of here Uh so as as Thirstston is changing into the employee
59:26
outfit uh it looks like he is struggling and kind of falling off the loading dock
59:31
and catching attention because he goes down in a a heap of feathers Uh but suddenly he kind of uh in a in a billow
59:40
and flash of light he emerges from it with the security guard uniform that everyone seems to think he was wearing
59:46
all along uh and with a a distinct cry from the World of Breadcraft expansion
59:53
the burning croissant and uh an imitation of the one of the final uh
59:58
bosses having that phoenix that uh everyone really wants And that one's called uh the uh screeching rebirth
1:00:08
Okay Yeah And everyone ish everyone is always excited Yeah It's chaos but
1:00:14
you're still excited to see these you know cosplayers the nerdy references the all of these things You get a few cheers
1:00:20
and then the light the but you're it's poor lighting and everyone's attention
1:00:26
moves on So I am going to say with this yeah everyone is able to make it to the
1:00:31
truck except Professor Beakley you are still inside Yep I'm going to uh going
1:00:36
to take a few more pictures and then saunter out the front entrance Uh back
1:00:42
at the I am going to say you don't have any trouble getting out with the crowd It's a little it's a little bit of a
1:00:48
rush Yeah Yeah There's still a lot of chaos but everyone is trying to leave The employees are trying to get you to leave It is not a problem to walk out
1:00:56
particularly since you have nothing suspicious on you Uh so yes you all you
1:01:03
you everybody climbs into the car except Professor Beley who went out the front and drives back to the hotel You get
1:01:10
into the hotel parking garage and you head back up to your penthouse suite And
1:01:15
Professor Beley it is not a problem to walk over to the hotel take the elevator
1:01:21
up no problem Everyone is back in their suite with
1:01:26
I'm going to dispose of the van while they do that Okay And uh the boxes the
1:01:31
extra crates of pretzels that you you managed to get off with because they were waiting outside for you You loaded
1:01:38
those onto the truck You are quite a hall You guys you got to try the pretzels that are in the trophy They are
1:01:46
so good Somebody needs to call Lou and let him know that we that we got it It is like this special like asagio Asagio
1:01:55
cheese pretzel that has hunks of cheese inside So you taste it and it's like a
1:02:00
little bit of like this perfect pretzel with that kind of salty taste and then you get a little bit of cheese like just
1:02:07
the right amount and it's it's so good It's so good Totally different kind of
1:02:13
good Still good Yeah I I'm sorry It's really good right now actually Uh yeah Yeah it does I I
1:02:21
apologize And you call Lou and Lou comes up You You were like surrounded in
1:02:27
pretzels You divide up your spoils Seagulls
1:02:34
Louis paid off the seagulls in you know helping with the heist and also they got pizza You know that's that's kind of a
1:02:41
payment in itself I mean I pizza too
1:02:46
This is This is great Metel is going to be ruined by this chaos
1:02:53
I can't wait to see it all of these years watching him make it big off of
1:03:01
these pretzels He wouldn't share It's just fair You got to share You got
1:03:08
to share the loot with your birds He takes a bite out of one Just as
1:03:15
delicious as I remember Is the Is the actual trophy edible Uh I'm going to say
1:03:20
yes I'm going to say it's a giant It is a giant pretzel You know you know the
1:03:25
way Yeah food that is made to like look really pretty and in this case it's supposed to be kind of sturdy It It
1:03:32
doesn't taste stale exactly but the outer dough is a little too Oh this is
1:03:40
super crunchy Yeah it's a it's a little crunchy and it's got like extra egg wash
1:03:46
on it to make it like shiny and crisp So it's it's not the best pretzel you've ever eaten but it is I'm going to take
1:03:52
I'm going to take a bite out of it just for the principle of the thing It's not It's not bad but it's not as good as the
1:03:58
other pretzels Like maybe maybe it could have had a dipping sauce Maybe some cheese sauce would be good Something
1:04:05
Yeah it's an all right pretzel It's not the best pretzel I called down to the CEO Professor Beakley prefers I called
1:04:12
room service to see if they can send himself some cheese sauce and mustard
1:04:17
Absolutely You had a thinking my bird Um I I'm I've got to say something because
1:04:24
uh Matt sent me a DM I am going to
1:04:30
uh Matt make me a Oh gosh I need I need
1:04:37
a roll from you I'm going to say it's a feathers roll at disadvantage Five Did he win Five is a success on a
1:04:46
feathers roll So while a six a six is still a success on a feather roll So
1:04:52
while you have been enjoying your loot I would like everyone else to make a
1:05:00
brains roll A ro I don't have any of those
1:05:06
A little one Failed before I've rolled a one I rolled a one I've also rolled a
1:05:11
one So we have three ones And what about you Thirsten Three A three is a success
1:05:17
So we have three ones which is a gadgets role You have some piece of technology
1:05:24
that is going to help you succeed with what with what is happening right now which is Matt causing trouble So you all
1:05:32
remember how Drum said he was going to get rid of the van Yeah Yeah You
1:05:38
thirsten you noticed Drum He was going to get rid of the van but he was going to come back I mean obviously he wants a
1:05:44
share of the spoils It's been a little too long and he is still not back And
1:05:50
you think for a minute Dr was going to go to the convention He was just going to go to the convention He had this
1:05:56
cosplay all worked out He was he loves these games You don't think that large
1:06:02
fellow would be back after all of this He'd be foolish enough to to make it to
1:06:07
the this afternoon and the second day of the conference do you Well I mean did he
1:06:13
win the contest I no one knows the contest didn't end because the lights
1:06:19
went off the fire alarm got pulled But I am going to say you keep thinking about this This is bothering you and you're
1:06:24
talking you know throwing some ideas around with everyone and you he is what
1:06:29
if he has called the cops because he doesn't want he doesn't want me to be
1:06:36
ruined He loves this guy and the games he's made You guys did he is he is he a
1:06:42
snake the snake in emu clothing could be said to be a dual pigeon
1:06:50
So So Thirstston has figured this out He throws out this idea to the rest of you
1:06:55
The those of you who rolled ones the three of you who have rolled once you have some kind of gadget that is going
1:07:01
to help you get out of this situation that is going to help you you know either make out with the loot or get
1:07:07
away before anyone can show up I have a suggestion H I could just text them I
1:07:13
don't have anything to do with them I just don't want to see missile get ruined So I could text them and say you should leave The FBI's coming
1:07:21
Okay Okay And yeah so the three of you get a text message that says you should
1:07:28
get out of there cuz uh Keith's about to come down on you What What do all of y'all do Dirty rat I'm gonna um Well I I
1:07:38
I will let you decide if you think he's helping you out or if he's radic I'll you can make your own call there Yeah
1:07:45
Yeah Your gadget could be your cell phone or you can think you know think of something Anything you want Put the mask
1:07:52
back on I mean are are you staying here or are
1:07:58
you getting I'm going to go down into the lobby to where the bar is at I'm like "You guys I'm going to make a
1:08:04
distraction You get out of here." Okay So you you go down into the lobby I'm
1:08:11
going to say make a feathers roll with advantage The
1:08:16
six is a success on a feathers roll Okay So what are you doing The other one was
1:08:24
like a two Do we get the What are you doing
1:08:30
I'm gonna walk into the lobby where the the DJ is still playing right I'm gonna
1:08:36
walk into the lobby and I'm gonna throw my gloved hands high and go Gamers
1:08:43
welcome to the afterparty Come on everybody let's go
1:08:48
dance And I'm just going to like start busting some moves on the dance floor in front of the DJ and see if I can get
1:08:56
everybody else to come over They are they completely 100% buy it Absolutely
1:09:03
buy it Uh so yes there is a crowd of cheering fans and they kind of you know
1:09:10
they start to spill out into the lobby The FBI does show up You know there's
1:09:15
some sort of heist An emergency call was made but they're caught up in all of
1:09:21
these fans and they can't they can't figure out what's going on There is such crowd it's hard to even make it to the
1:09:26
front desk The rest of you get out the back or get out however you can use whatever you got So I will say two of
1:09:33
you still have a gadget roll to work with So Professor Beakley is going to
1:09:38
bust out her backup um disguise which is an animatronic Baron bagel gaz costume
1:09:46
upon whose shoulder he perches Okay So you got a great disguise here Yep and
1:09:52
just gonna mingle with the uh the partygoers for a minute and then squeak
1:09:57
out the the front door at the first opportunity Okay Yeah No I'm going to
1:10:03
say no problem with your gadget And I believe Frankie uh my gadget is a
1:10:09
toolbox from the construction store from the hardware store I live in Um makes it a lot easier to pack my portion of the
1:10:15
loot And I'm just going to take half that trophy for the PR for the principle of the thing Shove it all Shove it all
1:10:20
in this nice tool box and uh pick it up and uh make it make it make make my
1:10:25
escape for it A lot of pretzels fit in the bear and bagel gas costume as well
1:10:30
Uh yeah I was going to I was going to ask who who's making off with their loot Yeah I'm definitely taking my portion Uh
1:10:37
I'm taking John's portion too So I I will say if any of of you with
1:10:43
those successful roles anyone including you Thirstston because you you got on to this idea before everyone else did you
1:10:50
were starting to pack up your loot if you want to And all of you were able to
1:10:55
make it out and evade the FBI presence in the lobby So is anybody like telling
1:11:02
like this is all out in the open so I can actually like leave Yeah cuz I failed
1:11:09
Oh wait You completely failed Okay I'm going to say we had more successes than
1:11:14
failures on that role considering the gadget roles So I'm going to say that uh
1:11:20
between Thirsten and Frankie and uh a big distraction Oh there Yeah I'm going
1:11:28
to say everyone else you know when you're kind of misststepping there kind of uh you know maybe uh all of these
1:11:35
names Maybe Professor Beakley grabs you and kind of tucks you behind that big
1:11:40
bulky costume and thirst was like "Okay you got to was advising you like "Okay
1:11:45
you got to get out Get this Take this bag You got to go." So everyone else is helping you to make sure that you can
1:11:52
get out Yeah Then I wouldn't even care about the loot at this point I would be so mad I'm I just leave or get out and
1:11:58
like start planning my revenge Oh boy Uh so I'm going to say everyone everyone
1:12:05
has made it out successfully And a few pretzels stuffed in her pockets
1:12:12
Not all of her loot though but she's got the recipe and that's all she need I'm
1:12:18
I'm going to say yeah everyone tell me what you You're all going your separate ways now unless you want to do something
1:12:24
else And so I want to know what you're what you're doing next What you're doing from here Professor Beley where where
1:12:29
are you going after this Um I'm going to go and visit the the the home nation or
1:12:38
the home uh continent of my ancestors Africa I've never been there And I hear
1:12:44
that my people are kind of endangered in the wild So I'm going to take all the
1:12:49
bread to them What a noble thought Okay And Frankie where are you going with
1:12:56
your ill gotten gains Uh we just see Frankie uh back in the rafters of the uh
1:13:02
the local home the Home Depot uh with his uh he opens it up and he calls his uh his cronies around He says "All right
1:13:08
everybody successful day Eat up." He has a little pretzel buffet for his uh for
1:13:13
his pigeon underlings Yeah Everyone is thrilled you are their
1:13:18
new best friend Everyone is so excited to be here working with you Okay So uh
1:13:25
Thirsten where do you go from this adventure Oh the West Coast is new money I don't like to spend more time than I
1:13:31
need to but I did catch word of a polo match that was happening a little bit up the coast So I fly up the I-15 and uh
1:13:40
pick my way around to see if there's any uh you know discarded bon bonss that I can pillage Uh so Drum where where are
1:13:49
you headed after all this Cut to the Mets pretzels uh campus where the truck
1:13:56
drives up stops on a parking spot which then descends into the bowels of the
1:14:01
earth come to a dark uh fast and furious
1:14:07
style base where I come out and as I do pull off the emu mask revealing the face
1:14:13
of Chris Metzel Stage one is complete Soon that
1:14:18
pigeon who stole from me and all his appliances will be destroyed and I get a
1:14:25
bunch of claps from my minion I I am going to say Mr Medzl that you do know
1:14:31
it's a it's a pigeon that originally stole your first pretzels I don't know exactly which pigeon it was
1:14:38
The one that operated that organized this heist My Eternal F Yes it was it was it was Lylie Lou And you almost you
1:14:47
almost caught him once You nearly had him this plan By the way why are you
1:14:52
recapping everything
1:14:58
Do I pay you to recap things Okay that's fine That's totally bitching
1:15:05
You took it this direction I have to follow through So you you know you knew
1:15:10
Lou was going to plan something for this There were just too many pretzels for him to ignore it You have been trying to
1:15:16
lure him in all along But he sent he sent these flunkies He sent these flunkies instead of coming himself
1:15:22
That's that's unacceptable You're going to have to do something about this But wait till they wait till they find out
1:15:28
the secret I hid in those pretzels It's a totally pigeon secret
1:15:35
Yeah Benny what are you up to after this Yeah Benny Benny is is not a normally a
1:15:42
conventionally smart bird However Benny is a bird that understands revenge and
1:15:48
is driven by rage Uh and so I think what winds up happening is he's he spends his
1:15:55
his share of the loot after he gets out of there Uh and when Metel goes to his
1:16:01
private quarters in his uh little underground uh bunker uh what greets him
1:16:08
is just thousands of statues of Lucky Lou and they're all in this like big
1:16:15
grin and there's just pretzel crumbs scattered everywhere with a little uh
1:16:22
with a little note that says "You're welcome." as instead of the horse head that's what he gets in his private
1:16:28
quarters Okay Yeah that's a good one And CeCe you you were the last member of our
1:16:36
crew CeCe is going to sache her way back to the east coast where she belongs
1:16:41
Thank you very much And take that recipe with her And she's going to go back to
1:16:46
the streets again where she belongs Thank you very much And she's going to find a nice chef somewhere one of those
1:16:53
nice hoidy toy five star chefs that they've got all up and down um the really fancy parts of town Uh and she's
1:17:00
going to seduce them and get them to uh show her how to read that recipe and they're going to make a beautiful
1:17:06
pretzels together Okay And uh Lou himself manages to get out with the rest
1:17:12
of you He Lou has been around He was He
1:17:17
always has a backup plan He gets out with a bag of pretzels of his own and continues to plot his own revenge
1:17:24
against Christopher Metzel One day Metsel one day And that is our game of
1:17:31
Pigeons 11 which I knew it was going to be strange I think it it went absolutely
1:17:38
beyond my expectations Thank you everyone for playing today Would you say
1:17:43
we took it to 11 Yeah you took it to 12 guys You took it
1:17:49
to 12 At least 12 That's the power of poop operative storytelling
1:17:57
Uh yeah I had I had this idea to set it at a parody version of
1:18:03
Blizzcon and Mitch had the suggestion that the Metsel should be a pretzel
1:18:11
maker and it kind of it spiraled from there Of course Mitch I think it works
1:18:17
And every one of you took it and ran with it I I appreciate you all I
1:18:23
appreciate you for joining us in this craziness I was personally just trying to keep up with Joe and and Dan because
1:18:30
I knew they were going to show up today expected to do impressions of my boss but
1:18:36
okay And it was a very good impression I I I thoroughly enjoyed
1:18:43
this So yes that is that is Pigeons 11 Thank you everyone for listening and uh
1:18:51
if you enjoyed the show please subscribe to Tavernwatch on your podcast player of choice And you can support Blizzard on
1:18:59
Patreon at patreon.com/bizzardwatch so we can make more podcasts like this that are super
1:19:06
extra weird Thank you so much everybody
1:19:12
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1:19:32
We'll see you next time folks
1:19:37
[Music]
#Live Comedy
#Spoofs & Satire