Baby's First Bounties - Diablo 3 Season 5

So, because we're at level 1, and we have no gear, and no abilities, I set it to hard

which is like the second difficulty, which is not actually hard at all

And I think our first big goal is to reach torment. Torment 1

Oh really? So, and that's not too hard, I think. So. Okay

So, we're in the middle of getting abilities and stuff. And we can either, I don't recommend we start with a rift, though we can, but I think we

should just do bounties. Are you good at that? Lead the way, because you know way more about this than I do

Yeah, I've only been carried through seasonal character. Okay. Rifts are fine once you have more than your basic one ability

But we have to level up a couple times first. Okay. So, on the map, let's just do the cursed depths

Can we do any of the new places? We don't, we can go there, but we have nothing to do there right now, besides look around

Oh, okay. We can still go there if you want to. No, that's fine. Where should we go

Let's go to the keep depths level 2. Okay. Yeah, Vaikyu, the hotz mount was the exact same reason season 4 is the first time I ever

played this. That's what got me into it, too. I was like, I want that mount, but I don't really like Diablo

Then I played it and was like, oh, actually I do like Diablo. Yeah, I liked it when I first played it, and then I just ran out of stuff to do

Yeah, see, with my one ability, I'm 1 and 2 shutting these guys, so hard isn't able

to be defined as hard. Oh, level 2. Level 2, we got an ability

What the heck? What am I doing? You're shooting ice. Oh my God

It was not that a second ago, so I was expecting to wand it, and then all of a sudden I just

started shooting ice. Wow, okay. Yeah, witch doctors don't start with a very good ability

It has a pretty long cooldown as far as Diablo goes, which is lame

Can I pick something else yet? No

Yeah, other people might join us later. They might not. I don't know

We're kind of just, if people want to play, they can play. If they don't want to play, they don't have to

But yeah, I don't know how to hit Y to look at the Season tab

Yeah, that's... But isn't there like specific, like stage 1, stage 2 kind of stuff

Am I misremembering? I don't know. Uh, hold on one second. I don't know

Let me go back one second. Okay, equip all your loot, because we're basically naked right now

Everything is useful. I barely have enough power to destroy these furniture

Well, destroying furniture is the most important thing, so we have to level up quickly

It really is. That's my favorite part. Yeah, that's what I play this game for

Okay, I'm back. Welcome back. Thank you. You missed our discussion about how this is an Ikea destroying game

Where we're not here for the demons, we're here for the chairs? Oh

Oh, you know, they should do, like, instead of a cow level, they should do an Ikea level

because Ikea is kind of like a dungeon. Like, the, you know, general outline is kind of confusing

It'll be like a challenge to see how much... To see how much furniture you can, like, break before losing your chain. Exactly

Oh, I should change to corpse spiders. Spiders. You get bonus experience for destroying furniture

You do. So in an Ikea level, you would want to destroy as much of it as possible without losing your combo

to get the maximum XP. Yes. Perfect. Let's design a game. Break furniture

Okay, let's do it. This ice beam is so cool. Are you guys still fighting stuff over here

There, it was a trap. Yeah. Four guys dropped in and we were unprepared. Dogs

Can you guys see my dogs or no? I think there was a thing where you can't see other people's pets anymore

because it was really annoying. Uh, I think I see them. Oh, yeah, they're very..

Yeah, I see them. They're, like, transparent-ish. Hmm. Yeah, um, witch doctors in particular can get kind of out of control with pets, so..

Yeah, I've seen a couple videos that are just insane. Probably a necessary thing

I mean, if you're playing with somebody else and they're a witch doctor

it can get to the point where you can't see your screen. So it's probably not very fun to play with one if they weren't transparent

We would do carrying with the witch doctor, and we got it to bug once or twice where you would still get experience in town

And we have no idea how we did it. Weird. Wow, things are dying pretty fast

It had to do with the pets. Yeah, that's what I said, hard isn't hard by any means

I don't... It's Diablo hard, I guess. Like, it doesn't actually get hard until Torment levels, I think

It's, I mean, after you have abilities and stuff. Gotcha. Eh, it's fun, though

And, you know, lasers. Yeah. The arrow's pointing this way, so I'm going this way

Oh, come to me. Huh? Oh, we took different routes. Yeah. Fire bats

I'm in combat. No, I'm not. Okay. The arrow's pointing this way

Do you guys not get the arrow? Oh, I got the arrow, I just was not paying attention

Oh, yeah, I'm just killing things. Yeah, but we kill things in this direction. Oh

It's pointing to where we're supposed to go. I think a beast just, like, hit me with its tongue

Is that a thing? That's awkward. Yes, it is. It's kind of like, um..

Lick a tongue. Did you play Resident Evil 2? Mm, oh, I know what you're talking about

I didn't, but I know what you're talking about. The Lickers. Yeah. I think they were actually called Lickers

Yeah, they were. Oh, wait, no, I played a little bit of Resident Evil 2

Not that much. But enough to know that. The Resident Evil series is kind of like the Metal Gear series to me

That it was one of those series that I played a lot as a kid. But unlike Metal Gear Solid, the Resident Evil series started to really suck

See, 4 was the one that I really played. Like, I didn't really play any of them until 4

And then 4 got me to kind of go back and play 2 for a little bit. But at that point, 2 was so outdated and I didn't care enough

But I love 4. Like, 4 is my, that's one of my classics

Yeah, you're like a few years younger than me, I think, right? Yeah

So, yeah. So, Resident Evil 2 probably came out like, relatively at the same age as Resident Evil 4 came out for you

Yeah. Did that phrasing make sense at all? Yes. Okay. I think 4 came out when I was, I want to say like, 13, 12, 12 or 13

Yeah, that sounds about right for Resident Evil 2 for me. And Metal Gear Solid came out, Metal Gear Solid 3 came out when I was 12

And didn't you like, start the series when you were 12 or something? Yeah, I think the first one came out in 1998, so I would have been 11 or 12, yeah

Yeah, I was 6. We're not killing these very quickly. We ran out of time

I forgot, I have AoE. I have every single arrow. Oh, hello

Okay, well, we didn't get a chest, that's fine. And now, we get out of this place and we go somewhere else

Hold on, there's demons with bellies. What? Okay. I saw them and I had to kill them

Okay, well, now we go to the Bridge of Corsic. Oh, Mitch

How cool is that? You kind of look like the Star Wars guy, your character

Yeah, I do. Wait, the... Where? Oh, I see. Stop that, dogs. I didn't tell you to do this

Oh, hey, pants. I have spare pants if anybody needs pants. Uh, I don't have pants. Oh, no, I have pants. Okay

I can use a bow. You're going to need a lot of..

It's a magic bow. You can use pretty much anything unless it's a bow

It's a magic bow. You can use pretty much anything unless it's a class-specific type, like mighty weapons for barbarians

Only barbarians can use those. Otherwise, if you find a polearm, you can totally use that

That's interesting. Ow. I don't think I like fire bats. They are obnoxious

Not my favorite. They should be good against my frost. Gat, why don't you freeze them some more

It's on a long cooldown. Freeze harder. Okay, that was actually effective

Okay, I'm getting rid of fire bats. Not a fan. Ooh, magic mace

So many magic things. Okay, let's go down the hole. What? Oh, I see

We go in here. Down the rabbit hole. And we get to cleanse another cursed thing

There are a lot of curses here. Yeah, it's kind of this game's thing

Everything's a little bit cursed. Oh, who pulled this thing

Oh, is that not part of the event? No! Oops. Yeah, he's strong. Yeah

And, uh... We probably blew the event again. Yeah, that's fine. We still get credit for the bounty for, like, finishing all of them

We just don't get a bonus chest. Sorry, I just started lasering

You just ruined all my level 7 dreams. Well, that's my goal. With you

Oh, okay. Acceptable. Someday, I'll have good abilities

I have all the abilities I need right now. That ice beam is a pretty good start, I must say

What did I... Horrify? I don't want to horrify. Meh. Okay, we leave again

Uh, Raccoon's Crossing. Dogs! I did not tell you to do this

You need leashes. Stop running away! You need cats. Or ferrets. Soon, I'll have zombies

Oh, much better. Uh, this isn't for our bounty, but we might be able to get loot if we don't screw it up

So let's do it. Okay. Maybe we'll get some stuff. Maybe we'll get some sweet level 8 epics

Oh, this is an easy one. We just have to kill these dudes. All done. Nice

So good. My dogs just ran up the stairs. They might be causing trouble

What are they doing? Just attacking stuff. They need obedience courses. For real

Oh, uh, they came back. Or they ran away again. Whatever. I don't know

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Leaping spiders. Ooh, I got something else. Uh. Whoa. Holy crap. Oh, we finished it

So we can go to Szechuan. Szechuan? Ron. Szechuan. Szechuan

Okay. Wait, where is that? Upper right corner. Oh, okay

We're getting some pretty easy ones. Apparently it's just right here. Enter the eternal woods

Is this a new area in Szechuan? Maybe it's not new, but I've never been in it, I don't think

Then I probably haven't either. It's cool looking. Oh, hello. Evil Eye of the Immortal

Ooh. He's a yeti. I froze him anyways. I'm not sure Iceborne is not a yeti

Apparently I can just- Oh, I'm dying. Yeah, don't do that. Apparently I can just spam this

Spam what? Uh, my wave thingy that I got. It uses arcane power, right

So you can spam it until you run out of stuff. Yeah, there's just no cooldown on it

Oh, I've got a turret gun. I'm rooted. There's a lot of dudes

Yeah. Where do they all come from? Tree is big. And a jerk

And a jerk. Wow. I threw spiders at this tree. Someone in chat confirmed this is a new area

Oh. Cool, we're getting some pretty quick and interesting bounties to start off with, so that's good

Yeah. Quick ones plus a new area. There are no crossover rewards for this season, are there

I don't think so? Aw. Oop, zombies

Woo! Kill the blue lady. This one? Uh, any of the blue ladies

Oh. Oh no, more coveyed. Ha ha ha ha. These remind me of witches in Left 4 Dead

Yeah. I didn't think about that, but you're right. Except, like, way less deadly

Hey, this one led me to an awesome chest. Oh, cool. Uh, did you change the thing at the top of Twitch? Yes

Okay. My page just didn't change then. I think you have to refresh it for it to actually work

Yeah, it does. Yeah, you do. A hat! Awesome. 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sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

I have to look up what level I get zombie Can you look it up

I can open my skills and click around I get zombie charger at oh next level 14 and gargantuan is at 19

Not bad Are we able to do the The skills wherever you want before you hit max

Yeah, yeah Okay, I need to change that oh Do you have to redo that oh, thanks

Stays Or is it gameplay Fighting me as soon as I was looking things up you can turn off the clock I

Don't want to know how I'm playing go away clock. I'll play all night if I want to

Actually, that's gonna bother me I need the clock back. Oh here. We go zoom when your inventory is open

Cool I don't like that either All right now I have shocker and turret the arrow has misled us we have to go around

No arrow why I Seem to remember the gargantuan coming at a later level than 19, but

yeah, I think they must have changed it because I have another witch doctor that I didn't get very far with and I'm

Pretty sure it took a while to get gargantuan I Don't think I've ever played a witch doctor whose tornado is this mine

Have arcane Tauren now Come on level 14 I need my zombie

I'm fighting a boss with our limited skill set should be fun

We got this in that fun kind of way Well we have more than two abilities, so we're probably fine yeah

I mean Mitch has tornadoes. That's true. You can't stop a tornado. Yeah

It's cuz I'm really fast that's cuz I have turret guns I

We doing what I'm just all standing back here, that's what we do

What it means they're fighting my dogs up there or what Think Oh legendary two-handed axe that I don't know

You he like his guts came out Yep Zombie

No You should macro that you should No, I don't think you can make macros in this game

But just yell out the lyrics to zombie every time you summon a zombie That's not now we go back to town and turn in our crap tutorial