Be wary of Dr. Junkenstein’s Halloween popcorn ball recipe

The Overwatch community has a fixation with food. First it was pancake Lucio, now Junkrat’s evil alter ego Dr. Junkenstein himself is cooking up appropriately bizarre Halloween treats. In the Twitter video below, which seems to be a cross-promotion with foodie fav Tasty, you can watch Junkenstein create some of the most decadent popcorn balls you’ll ever see.

Ladies and gentleman, Dr. Junkenstein’s latest creation.

🎞️ @Tasty pic.twitter.com/eNtuZwT9C0

— Overwatch (@PlayOverwatch) October 24, 2017

I take issue with one small detail: I’m pretty sure their recipe is supposed to say 12 cups of popcorn, not 12 cups of popcorn kernels. A standard 3.5 ounce bag of microwave popcorn yields 12-13 dry cups of popcorn once popped, and the bag’s initial weight includes the oil, salt, and butter flavoring. If roughly three ounces of popcorn kernels yields 12 cups of popped popcorn, then according to my mental math, 12 cups of popcorn kernels would yield 432 cups of popped popcorn. You’ll need a lot more than 24 ounces of chocolate to coat that many balls.

For the record, I failed math throughout the entirety of my school days. I might be a little off. Still, 12 cups of popcorn kernels is a lot of popcorn. I strongly advise against cooking 12 cups of popcorn kernels at one time. You won’t be able to celebrate Halloween, because you’ll be buried beneath an avalanche of popcorn, unable to escape its hullish embrace.