The Queue: We’ve made it through another week!

Hooray everyone, and happy Friday! We’ve successfully navigated another week and I think that’s cause to celebrate by doing nothing nada just giving your brain a break for aw hile

Or maybe by reading the Queue! Whatever works.

Honestly, I don’t have the patience for queues. If it’s more than 15 minutes I’m going to walk away from my computer, and if it’s more than 30 minutes I’m going to walk away from my computer and forget I was even queueing for something. There are always plenty of things vying for our attention, and if one of them comes with an hour wait I’m probably just going to go do another.

As to the queue that feels long but isn’t: Hearthstone. Queues for anything in Hearthstone are very fast, but occasionally it gets stuck spinning on something that timed out or someone. It always spins for a long time, and you know pretty quickly when a game isn’t going to work because games tend to start on a specific schedule, and going a moment over that amount of time means you probably won’t have a game… but still you wait.

Not that I’m aware of. While there are always 29 rooms to get into, they’re semi-random rooms in a semi-random order. And honestly, we haven’t had that many resets of Zskera Vaults yet in order to establish a pattern. Only what’s in the central atrium seems to be the same for all players every week: beyond that you may or may not have the same rooms as I do, and the rooms you see this week may or may not be there next week.

So unfortunately there’s nothing I would call a map — again, nothing that I’ve seen – though we do have an article of tips on solving each room’s puzzles you could lean on for help, even though it doesn’t sound like that’s what you were looking for.

I have Horizon Forbidden West on the brain, so I’m going to say Ashly Burch. She voices Aloy primarily as good natured and willing to help anyone who asks, but Aloy also has no patience for jerks or fools, and can get this note of dry sarcasm when she deals with them. I think some of that attitude would be very on point for any WoW character that we assume has been doing these same old quests for 18 years now.

BuzzFeed takes a lot of flak, often written off as the punchline to a joke about click-bait online headlines. Top 5 Blizzard Watch Queues: you’ll never believe number 3! But BuzzFeed News actually did serious journalism — heck, the org won a Pulitzer — and BuzzFeed had made a serious effort to build a newsroom full of professional journalists.

But the internet isn’t interested in reading long-form content. I bet a silly listicle gets ten times the traffic — minimally — as any hard journalism. So like every other newsroom in America, they’re cutting back. News coverage is going away and you can expect to see a lot more listicles.

I keep seeing this as a joke, but it’s honestly part of a sad trend of cutting long-form content and journalism. The news media is not obligated to truth, but to profit, and the news isn’t profitable. So bring on the listicles, folks, because we will be getting more of them.

Even this Queue is really short today! The cutbacks are everywhere!

And that’s it for now everybody. It’s Friday, so take care of yourselves and have a good weekend.