Don’t we all? But instead of pondering our many regrets, let’s answer some questions.
Sometimes I play through quests and imagine them narrated, nature documentary style, by David Attenborough.
Now watch as the Old God examines its prey…
I am the antelope in this documentary, and things never go well for the antelope.
And now you have! Aren’t you happy about that?
As I finish writing this at around eight in the morning, I find myself utterly unable to come up with a unique or clever way to introduce the day’s column. Today, cleverness is DIY.
I am really not feeling welcome here, you guys.
This is Liz, reporting in. Yes, of course it’s Liz. No one here but us Lizes. Absolutely, 100%, definitively Liz. Why would you even ask that?
Why does everyone keep telling me to smile? I am smiling! This is my smile!
And if you don’t like it, well, these teeth are pretty sharp.
Save the day, wreck someone’s day… they’re almost the same thing, right? Right.