The Queue: In which Hulkenberg eats fruit

Her name is Eiselin Burchelli Meijal Hulkenberg, and she’s a Knight who likes to eat.

This is The Queue, and we like to answer questions. And we’re all out of fruit.

There are so many possibilities I can think of, but one that would probably work really well — almost as if the franchise was purposefully developed with something like this in mind, one could say — is, obviously, Overwatch. With its ensemble cast of clearly-defined heroes and villains and a familiar world, it could easily become an animated series, and we’d finally get all that character development we’ve always wanted, and see the story move forward.

An Overwatch series, should it exist, would have the potential for a perfect balance between serious and lighthearted moments. It could feature hefty drama while still ending on a positive note, and have an optimistic tone overall. Optimistic stories about the future can be a rare thing, but the world of today could certainly use more of them — and Overwatch has (had?) a lot of potential to deliver that.

That would be fun. It could feature a Gnomish tinker trying to convince the world that the monster is not real. Madly taking pictures of the monster that would somehow prove that we’re all hallucinating when looking at it, that it does not in fact exist. That it’s just a hoax, a mechanical creature made by a mad gnome, a magic illusion cast by a Dark Iron Sorcerer, a Demon from the Twisting Nether attempting to cause division amongst Azerothians, a spawn of the Old Gods trying to drive everyone insane.

You’d explore all of those options while travelling the world, taking lots of pictures that attempt to prove that the monster isn’t in fact real. And then the monster would eat you and the tinker, and you’d have to get out of its belly, but the tinker would still not believe that he was eaten by a real monster.

The reward would be a tinfoil hat, WoW’s first hat that fully supports every hairstyle for every race.

Either Pearl Jam’s cover of The Jackson 5’s cover of Stevie Wonder’s Someday at Christmas (with an absolutely killer bassline by Jeff Ament) or Mando Diao’s Ringing Bells, which always starts playing in my head when I go into the Ringing Deeps in WoW.

I’ve never played any of the FE games that include a time skip and a new generation that inherits stats/skills from their parents (that you paired up yourself on the previous generation), so I’d love to see a new one with that particular mechanic. It’s a really fun concept that adds a ton of replay value as well.

Narratively speaking, no Fire Emblem game has ever come even close to Three Houses in my opinion. Most of them have pretty basic or generic stories, but Three Houses broke the usual mold in many interesting ways, having a story with no clear hero or villain (outside of one specific group of antagonists): how the story develops depends on your perspective, and your choices throughout the game. The fact that any classmate you don’t recruit to your house during the peaceful school days might end up an enemy general five years later — someone that you’re forced to face (and perhaps kill) on the battlefield, with the game not shying away at all about displaying the consequences — adds a lot of weight and drama to the story.

I mean, it’s been over five years, and people still have lengthy discussions about whether one of the main characters is a hero or a villain! (I’m on team villain, by the way.) So gimme more of that. Gimme plenty more of that!

I am, actually! Going in with zero expectations, but I’ll give it a try. I like capys, and I like crows too. That’s a killer combo!

Oh fair lady of the lake, impart me thy wisdom: what is the best hunter pet? For the DPS.

Have a good one, Queue. Always make sure your food has stopped moving before you start eating it, and if you’re on a beach, don’t take any fruit from strangers. Be safe, be brave, and be good!