The Queue: I missed you Claptrap!

Claptrap is one of my top favorite video-game characters of all time. There’s something so endearing about a tiny robot that is so annoying that everybody in the game hates him. He gets just the right amount of annoying traits to earnest desires for friends to rage-filled tirades against the jerks who steal his stuff that it shouldn’t work — but it does! It’s a tough line to walk for any character, and someone this poorly designed, one-wheeled, one-eyed little guy makes it work.

Borderlands 4 has been good fun so far! The team has put together a really solid, fun, looter-shooter that takes the best parts of the previous five games and adds some new stuff to speed up the movement a bit. Summoning your vehicle anywhere with basically no cooldown is a game-changer and really takes the slog out of the early zone once you get it. I also really like how the game’s humor has gotten a bit more focused than the last game. It’s still got jokes galore and funny moments, but I haven’t seen as much pop-culture referencing that popped up in Tiny Tina’s Wonderlands. There’s nothing specifically wrong with reference humor; it’s just not going to last as long as a well-written joke.

While I go and open like five more giant glowing chests full of weapons, it’s time for — The Queue!

Bacardi would be a Warlock. He’s very much a let someone else do the work kind of cat. I’m also not saying he’d definitely make a pact with demons for more power, but I wouldn’t be shocked to see a summoning circle in the basement one day.

Not every cat would be evil, but Bacardi has just the right aura of menace about him to make it work.

Arthur the St. Bernard would be a Warrior because he’s big and just wants to cause all sorts of trouble by sticking his nose into places it shouldn’t be. Meanwhile, his brother Vinny the Great Dane would be a Paladin because he’s always guarding the house and has that calmness that comes with age and purpose. They have a much older sister named Lulu, and she wouldn’t be a class; she’d be the Tauren you have to escort somewhere and will only walk super slowly and make you take way more time out of your day to help her.

Did you give it to someone to break open walnuts with? I know it’s not the heaviest controller, and certainly not as big as the original Xbox controllers, but I feel like it might be a good walnut cracker there.

More likely, it’s probably under a car seat because it fell out while you were trying to get something else out of your bag.

With her becoming the new Delve companion? Oh, most definitely.

I don’t think it’ll be a big change, but she’ll get some fresh duds that still closely match her red armor we all know, and probably some animation work under the hood to make her more fluid in combat. She has a great iconic Rogue look, so not much needs to change there. Even if she’s wearing bright red armor as a class that should be trying to be sneaky.

Dry Bowser in the streets and Samus in the sheets.

I don’t know what that says about me, but at least nobody is gonna push me around while I’m driving!

Although to say I have a Smash Bros. main is a bit of a stretch since I haven’t played in a million years. Fighting games are fine, and stage fighting games are fine, but I don’t tend to seek them out. The last one I went really hard on was the Soul Calibre game that had Yoda or Darth Vader, depending on the platform you were playing on. So somewhere in the 16-year-old range.

What big eyes you have, Bacardi!

The better to see shiny loot with is what he’d say if he could talk. He’s been keeping me company while I’ve been looting my way through Borderlands and has probably picked up a thing or two about giving out fantastic rewards as a result. That or he’s learned the wrong lessons, and you’ll get three whites and a blue in your Great Vault. It could go either way!

Would you rather

Be reincarnated as a hummingbird

Or

Be reincarnated as a panda bear

Today’s Anna Earworm™: Borderline

Have a loot-filled week, everybody! I bet Anna would appreciate it if you gave her a question-filled Queue!