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The QueueOct 13, 2017 12:00 pm CT

The Queue: Devilsaur

It’s a devilsaur, run!


GEOFF PETERSON

QftQ:

Is anyone else a little bummed the Overwatch Halloween event didn’t get a little more love?

Some of the skins are okay and some are meh. After the “Uprising” PvE event I pictured a Halloween event with a little more to it. I feel like Eichenwalde would have made a great haunted castle themed level with the oppurtunity for some fun designs.

I know I am probably expecting too much and Junkenstien’s Revenge is a fun, simple little horde mode. Also, the whole “wouldn’t you rather they just spend time on regular content?” argument is always there. I just feel like it there is room to expand it a little.

Wow. That that turned into an old-man rant without me realizing it.

Okay… Okay… I think we lost him, Geoff. Let’s take a break here in this tree stump and give him time to get after something else.

What were you asking about? Overwatch? Geoff, there’s a Devilsaur trying to eat us. I think… oh, okay, okay, if it’ll keep you calm we can talk about it for a bit I suppose.

I think in general Blizzard is pretty conservative in terms of holiday events — once they have one they like they tend to stick with it as much as they can. And since the Junkenstein event was the first PVE style mode they ever attempted, it’s sort of the template that later events like Uprising patterned —

Oh God he heard us, he’s coming back, run! No! Geoff!


KALCHEUS

Q4TQ: Do you think there’s room in the Warcraft cosmology for a nature magic between Hunters and Druids? Hunter uses animals in a pretty “functional” manner, while Druids become animals or use astral sources for a majority of their spells. I’m imagining something like the Scarlet Raven Priests (ranged spec) or the powers that Beastlord Darmac got from his downed pets (melee spec).

That thing ate Geoff, Kalcheus. It ate Geoff and it’s outside this cave, right now, waiting to eat us too. What are we going to do? Right about now I’d give your right arm — well, of course not my right arm, I’m using that — for either a Hunter or a Druid or some third class.

Heck, remember the Dinomancers from the Throne of Thunder? The ones from the Horridon encounter? They kind of blend the two disciplines — using dinosaurs as pets and also shape shifting into them — but they seem to pay for their ability to mix the two classes’ approach by being limited to just dinosaurs. Even then that’s a pretty big group so it’s not that big a loss. Wow, we could use one of those right…

Oh no. Kalcheus, you said this cave was safe! You said it was safe! It’s infested with raptors!

Kalcheus no! They’re eating him from the head down! Run! Everybody run!


TAUREN IT UP

Oh, man. I don’t think I’ve ever liked the idea of a 3 man mount until the phrase “guild blimp” was just suggested. That would actually be a super great reward for guilds (and guilds do need more rewards), but it would be so fun to see a small fleet of guild blimps flying in v formation off to the raid instance. I’d love to look up at those Orgrimmar skies and see someone off to save the world. That’s hella cool.

Look, we had to climb this tree to escape the devilsaur and the raptors. If you have access to a blind you should have mentioned it before now! They’ve already eaten Geoff and Kalcheus! They’re going to eat all of us! Why in the Light’s name did I ever let you all talk me into this Un’Goro expedition? I should have known when you said we’d meet at the Grove of Furrowed Flesh that nothing good would come of this.

Sure, Guild Blimps. Fantastic. Break one out. Please tell me you actually have a blimp. Wait, what’s that sound?

Pterrordax! Run! Save yourself, Tauren!


TIM HARRISON

When a story has a villain do something bad, or terrible, to a character you like (such as killing a character you like or some other awful act), do you find yourself blaming the villain, or the writer?

Look, I just write the Queue, I didn’t make those Pterrordax eat Tauren’s eyes. You think I wanted that to happen? His screams will haunt the waking nightmare that is my life now in this crater, Tim. How long have we been trapped here? Days? Weeks? It all blurs together. So many good friends and commenters eaten before their time. Well, it ends tonight, Tim. You and I will hunt and slay the beast.

Yes, you go to your cave. Get your spear and make ready. The hunt begins when you return.


VALLYNN

Now that Alleria+Turalyon have showed up, what WC lore figure has spent the longest out of the spotlight?

Vallynn, I have grave news. Much like lore figures like Anduin Lothar and Orgrim Doomhammer, Tim is dead. I found his corpse in the bushes, bit nearly in half.

No, I’m not mad! The devilsaur is still out there, stalking us! It’s not enough that it ate so many of us when we first arrived in this accursed land. Now it seeks to hunt us down and wipe out any trace of us, like World of Warcraft does with so many of its older lore figures. I sometimes worry when I hear that Garona is in the Rogue class hall that Blizzard will finally get around to killing her off.

What? Turalyon and Alleria? No, I can’t say I can think of any figure from the lore who has just disappeared like those two did. Died, yes, but not vanished. This devilsaur is as cunning and relentless as the devs themselves.

No, I don’t think it’s a good idea to split up… wait! Vallynn! Don’t go into the jungle alone!


CORY TAYLOR

Demon Hunters feel really fun, is this 12 years of experience, or condensing them to 2 specs to focus the cool. Both? Neither?

At last, beast, I have you.

It cost me Cory’s life to lure you into this pit. I didn’t even get to answer his question about Demon Hunters before you dragged him off to feed your wretched hatchlings. But oh, they weren’t there, were they? No, much like the third spec Demon Hunters never received, your hatchlings were nowhere to be found, were they?

I knew you’d panic. What’s that, Cory? Yes, I know you’re dead, but I did want to tell you that I think Demon Hunters benefit from over a decade of design iteration. Blizzard not only had the original classes and all their redesigns but has introduced DK’s and Monks before now, so they had a good handle on what to expect.

Look at her rage, Cory. I wish you could see her, thrashing in that pit. How long did it take us to dig it? Days? Weeks? Oh, no. I didn’t kill the hatchlings. They’re safe in a cave not far from here. But this beast… she and I have a reckoning this day. I will have vengeance for both of us.

Specifically I’ll be waving my hands around while hearts float over its head until it likes me. What? Oh, just go res already, I’m sure Kalcheus was exaggerating about how far the spirit healer is.

I hope you enjoyed our little story. Of course nobody really died, it’s World of Warcraft. The worst thing that happens is you get a timer.

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