The Queue: You could be moderately happy too

All of those rare things your friends are farming? You don’t have to farm them. You don’t need them! You can live your life without ever trying to get the X-45 Heartbreaker and be happier for it. Choose happiness this holiday season.

I have a dark secret… I have never farmed for the Heartbreaker mount and I credit this for continued sanity. Life is too short to spend all of my waking hours one week a year chain running the same dungeon in order to get a 0.00001% chance drop.

I live a (moderately) happy life because of this. You could be moderately happy too.

Red said in the comments that it’s a scam, and I think that’s probably the kindest thing you could call this particular kind of gameplay.

I’ll just say that if you’re going to make us pay $10 to play this Brawl to get a skin, just sell the skin for $10. If you want us to pay you money for things, don’t put a frustrating, time-limited piece of gameplay between us and the thing — just take the money and be happy we have given you money and aren’t spending all of our days writing internet screeds about how much of a scam Heroic Brawliseum is.

If you aren’t familiar with this game mode, Heroic Brawliseum is a Tavern Brawl in Hearthstone. These are special challenges that rotate weekly, with different goals, and they are free to play. Well, I should say they’re mostly free to play because this one costs $10. For your $10 you get to play matches against other players and get an increasing amount of rewards — gold, dust, and card packs — as your number of wins goes up. Or if you rack up three losses you’re out for good. This Heroic Brawliseum is unique because there’s a special Death Knight Hero to earn, if you win three times.

The average player is not going to win three times against competitive players with strong meta decks. I’ve never made it anywhere doing Heroic Brawliseum and I have a good card collection and modest amount of game knowledge, so I’m not even going to make an attempt this time. It’s not worth paying $10 to get nothing. It’s a scam.

I am here for all the transmog. I want new cosmetic sets and accessories. I want alternate colors of classic looks. I want weapons and shields that match the Blood Elf Heritage Armor which is a very unique shade of bright yellow gold that matches practically nothing.

I am honestly pretty mellow on pets and mounts. I mean, if they’re there, that’s cool. But transmog? Transmog is love. Transmog is life.

I think they’re less crazy because… I think the Primalists might be right.

The Titans showed up on Azeroth and said OKAY THIS IS HOW IT IS NOW, and the Primalists just weren’t interested. They wanted to keep doing… I don’t know, whatever it is that Primalists do. And the Titans weren’t okay with that, so they killed them or imprisoned them.

Did the Titans have any right to come here and tell everyone what to do? And then to wipe out anyone who didn’t agree with them? Sounds pretty dodgy to me. Sounds like the Primalists tried to defend themselves and now they’re pissed. The Dragon Aspects and the Primalists were once “as clutchmates.” But the Aspects accepted the Titans and their power… and proceeded to get rid of anyone who didn’t accept the Titans.

Now they’ve been locked away for 10,000 years and they’re pissed. There’s no peaceful way to resolve this. But maybe there could have been, millennia ago, if the Titans hadn’t insisted that everything on Azeroth had to follow their plan. That’s Titans for you.

Perhaps not all of today’s Primalists are entirely reasonable, sane people, but they make some reasonable points.

That’s all for now my friends. Be sure to hug your pets (unless they’re boa constrictors) and appreciate having heat in your home (because a lot of houses in my area currently don’t). Take care of yourselves and have a good weekend. I’ll see you back here next week.