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Matthew Rossi

Matthew Rossi @MatthewWRossi — Matthew Rossi is a synapsid, perhaps descended from Cynognathus. He was born in Providence, Rhode Island, and grew up there before leaving to see the world and be mistaken for a sasquatch and/or minor singing celebrity in various locales. He currently lives and writes in Edmonton alongside his amazing and beautiful wife and their cats. He’s written three collections of speculative fiction, Things That Never Were, Bottled Demon and At Last, Atlantis. He loves playing warriors in World of Warcraft, barbarians in Diablo III, and he’s beginning to notice a pattern here.


The Queue: Dinosaur Paladin again

Yes, I used Rezan again for the header image, are you kidding? I might never use another header image again.

So, you know how Zandalar won’t be getting Paladins in BFA? Well, I figured it out. It’s jealousy. Here’s why.

Human Paladins – “We get our power from the Holy Light.”
Dwarf Paladins – “Eh, whatever, that’ll do, we’re in for the Light deal.”
Draenei Paladins – “Naaru guide us.”
Blood Elf Paladins – “Well, we kidnapped a Naaru and tortured it until it died and went Void, but we’re cool now. Light’s cool.”
Dark Iron Paladins – “We –”
Lightforged Paladins – “Woah, woah, BACK UP, what did that Blood Elf just say? They did WHAT?”
Tauren Paladins – “We seek the Light of An’she, the glorious sun, the mate of Mu’sha.”
Lightforged – “I REALLY need us to do a rewind on what that Blood Elf just said.”
Zandalar – “A big freaking Dinosaur gave me my powers.”

Tell me everyone wouldn’t be jealous as hell.


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