The Queue

What it says on the tin.

This is The Queue, where you ask us questions and between this and daylight savings time we are just OVER IT.

I feel like this is self evident and doesn’t really need me to explain it.

It is just so satisfying to swoop through the air on a dragon, barely clearing mountains just to pick up speed going back down, barely dodging trees, crashing down into the ground right on top of the rare you mean to kill.

Okay. That’s a lie, because I almost never manage to dodge trees. But there’s still something viscerally satisfying about Dragonriding, and I’m looking forward to doing more of it, in a place where there are no trees to hit in patch 10.1.

Let’s Queue.

There came a time when the Old Gods died!

Man, all these years later and I still love Jack Kirby. Guy was a genius.

I know what you’re thinking: Kalcheus, you’ve clearly been diving into some old Tin Foil Hat articles if you’re dredging up the old Azathoth=Azeroth theory, but hear me out. When Y’shaarj got yanked out of Azeroth it caused a lot of bleeding but there’s no evidence the titans took a good look at the wound. What if it’s like a tick, where they tell you not to rip them off because it can leave behind a head — perhaps there’s a part of Y’shaarj still in the planet somewhere, ready to infect Azeroth. Granted, none of this syncs up with all of the various ruminations lately on a 5th old god, it’s just a thought I had.

Since I’m writing this on Tuesday night and am sure nothing of importance will be announced Wednesday morning let’s answer some questions!

It’s a balmy 72 degrees and climbing, and while in most places that’s cause to open the windows and breathe in that lovely floral spring air, for me it’s cause to hunker down. The tree pollen here gets so thick that I start sneezing, not because of allergies, but because the particulate in the air is so thick it tickles my nose. Even without the sneezing, everything outside is covered in a light yellow-green dust, and honestly, I don’t want to spend the next month mopping.

This is The Queue, where you ask us questions and we’ll answer as long as you brought us a tissue.

Last night was my favorite raid of the season — we got our Glory of the Vault Raider achievements!

There were some pretty good ones in this raid tier. I like the call back to the Lurker Below and the name of Raszageth’s achievement. I also liked how none of them were personal achievements, it felt good to all succeed together as a raid team, and not have to wait for everyone in the group to be able to dodge all of the mechanics flawlessly in a fight.

I will say though that I have reached my limit of appreciating achievements where you get bounced into the air in a fight and have to collect orbs. I could do without those going forward. They’re always the most awkward achievement to get out of the run, and usually, the solution is to just throw Demon Hunters and Evokers at the problem. I would accept having to use Chrashin Thrashin toys, or the Eye of Kilrog style toys where you control a smaller vehicle and have to drive that through things as a replacement for the next bounced up for orbs achieve.

While I figure out who to submit that idea to on the Warcraft team, it’s time for — The Queue!

It can’t possibly be Friday (again). I must be imagining it. I’m just filling in on the Queue for…. someone. Probably. Because it’s definitely not Friday.

But at my back I always hear/
Time’s wingèd chariot hurrying near;/
And yonder all before us lie/
Deserts of vast eternity./
Andrew Marvell, To His Coy Mistress

Yeah, turns out instead of being a Kree Supersoldier, Marvell was a British poet who, like a lot of other poets since poetry started, was really concerned that he should be having sex right now because we could die at any moment so it really makes sense to get all your boning in up front as much as possible.

Okay, so he did other stuff too like write things directly addressing Oliver Cromwell and convincing Charles II to not execute John Milton once Chuck was back on the English throne. But his poetical version of we’re all gonna die anyway, let’s get it on while we still can has always stuck with me as the classiest frat bro come on I’ve ever seen.

After much anticipation, the newest King Salmonid has arrived in Splatoon 3. The Horrorboros, as it’s known, is apparently a flying serpent-like boss that I’m sure will wreck face. To celebrate, there’s yet another Big Run happening this weekend! What’s Big Run? It’s basically the Salmon Run (i.e., horde mode) version of a Splatfest. Full weekend long. Unique map. End-of-event rewards.

I am definitely looking forward to it.

Of course, that’s Splatsville. This is The Queue.