The Queue

Friday is always a surprise, showing up without warning. But let’s put on our sunglasses and face the day. Let’s Queue.

I mean, I’ve played every Diablo game. I’ve played Grim Dawn, Wolcen, and Path of Exile. I’ve played Cyberpunk 2077 and I’ve literally used a gun that fires explosive grenades to slaughter an entire gang from up close. My character in Baldur’s Gate 3 is literally an amnesiac murder hobo who spends most of her game time completely covered in blood. Other people’s. That I have liberated from their bodies with big, pointy things. I’ve torn people’s limbs off, thrown people’s heads, flown away as the entire planet Taris was bombarded from orbit and millions died.

“Hello, Peter.”

…I mean, there’s a chance that’s your name — at least a few of you are probably called Peter. But even if it isn’t, that’s okay: my character here is not Doctor Octopus either, he was just modeled after him.

So let’s model this column around answering some questions!

I’m not sure what it is about summer that always makes me want to fire up Pokemon Go again. It’s not like I enjoy spending time out there — I’m firmly a cool, crisp autumn girly. Part of it is that I’m looking for something for my veal-calf-like children to do, and Pokemon Go is basically a cheat code for fun little outings in the nearest half mile or so. Libraries, parks, even silly little statues outside restaurants are all charted out for me. The other part is that I’m always looking for iced coffee, and thanks to a marketing tie-in, every single Starbucks is marked as a Pokestop. Sometimes capitalism is good, actually? Mm, let me think on that one for a sec.

This is The Queue, our daily column where you ask us the questions and we provide the answers, just let me catch this Ekans first. Darn. Darn. …Darn.

Today is the day, the final game of the Stanley Cup playoffs. It’s been a grueling postseason to get to this point, but the Edmonton Oilers have the chance to win it all and bring the Cup home to Canada for the first time in 30 years.

We’re all a little excited around the city, to say the least. There have been free concerts downtown, and I’m sure a record number of people calling in sick to work so that they can watch the game. Not only because we like it when our team wins, but because if they win tonight they’ll pull off a reverse sweep in the finals. Winning their 4/7 games after the Florida Panthers had already gotten three wins. Each game was do-or-die, and somehow they managed to get their stuff together and bring us to game 7. If the Oilers win tonight, they’ll be only the second team to win the Stanley Cup in a reverse sweep — the first was the Toronto Maple Leafs in 1942, 82 years ago!

It’s going to be a wild night!

I guess I can talk about video games until then though, it’s time for — The Queue!

That’s my secret, Cap. I’m always ready for a nap.

I am on record as loving Celldweller and New Elysium is on repeat lately.

I know I haven’t been around much lately and I’m sorry for that, but honestly, you’re probably a little bummed to get me this week instead of whatever cool thing Liz was going to do. I guess I could talk about a dinosaur or something, but really who cares?

It’s the Queue. Anyone who can guess what that header image is all about will get one free dinosaur fact in next week’s Queue.

Tavern Talk comes out tomorrow. A fantasy version of one of my favorite games Coffee Talk (which was an inspiration for it), Tavern Talk looks like a fun opportunity to be an innkeeper, sending adventurers on quests and changing their fates via the drinks you serve. I played the demo when it was first released (still available if you want to give the game a whirl beforehand) and every character I’ve met so far is a delight. Based on what I’ve seen I’m hopeful that the full game will fulfill the promise of its demo and inspirations, and if not well I always have Coffee Talk to play again.

So while I impatiently wait for the game to release let’s answer some questions!

While we deal with this blazing heat, one creature seems completely unphased. I’ve been knocking down joro spider webs on a near-daily basis for nearly a month. Right now they’re tiny little babies, about the size of a tic-tac. And yet each one of my tomato cages alone plays host to a half dozen or more, every time.

This is The Queue, our daily column where you ask us the questions and we’re really, really grateful for the crab filter.

Man, this was a slow weekend for the Queue! Is it nice outside or something? I know that where I live there are lots of people really tied up in the whole hockey situation, and I guess Father’s day must’ve had a hand in it too…

Weird! Time for the Queue.